


Claiming His Reward

by Kelkat9



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Timelines, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Romance, Smut, Time Travel, Timey-Wimey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-30
Updated: 2012-10-31
Packaged: 2017-11-17 08:40:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/549681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kelkat9/pseuds/Kelkat9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Time Lord Victorious may have lost Adelaide but he wasn't ready to give in to fate. He had a plan to reclaim the happiness he enjoyed earlier in his Tenth form and nothing will stop him. How will Rose and his earlier self deal with the repercussions of the actions of a Time Lord gone mad?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is for who_in_whoville who kept this plunny alive and begging to be written. This chapter is told from the POV of Time Lord Victorious. It's quite dark as he manipulates people and fights against his own guilt to achieve his goal. Time can be re-written. This is rated adult due to the dark nature and a bit of a hot adult scene between TLV and Rose in the following chapter. Also a big thank you to Callistawolf who helped push me on this and was moral support when I had a worried writer meltdown.  
  
  
  
Despite all his clever plans and brilliantly executed moves to save the heroic Adelaide, she was still dead. All of his boasting and declaring himself victorious had turned to ash. He, the last of the Time Lords, perhaps the most brilliant creature in the universe had been thwarted and cut to the quick. Now, there was a mysterious ood haunting him with dark prophecies about the end of his life, perhaps ending it permanently this time. He wallowed in his Tardis prostrate, staring up at the pulsing time rotor, consumed with thoughts of all that had happened and not just on the Bowie Base. He thought of everything, all the choices he’d made in his life, who lived, who died, who he helped or who he destroyed, the Daleks, his people, Earth, Martha, Jack, River, Donna and…  
  
He could barely finish that thought. Rose’s bright face illuminated the darkness of his mind. Not the Rose as he’d left her on Bad Wolf Bay, but as she was before Canary Wharf. Oh that wretched Canary Wharf, that’s when it all went wrong. Just as things had been looking up like he was to be gifted some happiness for all his misery, everything was cruelly ripped away from him. Rose and her faith in him, her joy and wonder at the universe, her endless compassion and her love…for him and so many more was lost. He had once said she kept him fighting but in the end what had he done but walk away. He had done what was right according to the ethics and rules he had been trained to uphold. He snorted when he thought about it. All those pompous and obnoxious rule makers, bureaucrats and politicians were gone now. What good were they anyway? But he, the rebel who constantly flaunted his liberal views in the face of those repressed, arrogant prats survived. He was clever and beat them all, even the Daleks. He won even if Adelaide had proved him wrong. He was the ultimate victor and he deserved a reward, not to lose all his friends and sit here alone on his magnificent time ship.  
  
This last thought settled heavily in his mind, mired in his misery and resentment. From this murky abyss of heartache and ire, an idea sprouted. A faint glimmer of a plan that tantalized the desires he had tried so desperately to bury into the deep recesses of his thoughts, was now igniting something inside of him, hope and yearning for what he had lost. He could do it, make it happen. He was a Lord of Time. The Doctor stood up and trailed his fingers across the console as he circled it, his mind speedily making calculations, evaluating all the possibilities and outcomes.  
  
He ignored the warning thrumming of the Tardis. Instead, he became more resolved and began working in earnest with quiet and cold determination. He delved deep into his Time Lord self focusing on time lines, fixed points, what could be, what must not be and meditated on weak points in time lines, divergences, parallels, possible paradoxes and the infinite outcomes. Treatises, theoretical temporal dissertations, mathematical equations and theorems along with his own interpretations, inferences and postulations whirled through his mind until he deemed himself ready. In the end, he convinced himself the solution was obvious, child’s play for someone such as him. He giggled when he thought about how he would use the genius of his people in a very Time Lord way for a very un-Time Lord activity that would lead to, if he was lucky and he knew he was, some very naughty Time Lord fun.  
  
He could rewrite time and change his life and the lives of his companions. It would take some delicate work on his part. Not to mention, the cooperation of the Tardis, but he was very sure what he planned would succeed. He would do this even though it would destroy this him in the process, leaving a younger more foolish version of himself still in existence. He would have to do something about that. Thinking of how foolish he had been and how he had wasted opportunities angered him. He gripped the console hard. He had to make himself understand without pushing things too far.  
  
He smirked when he thought of a way to assure his goals would be accomplished even if this him was gone. In the process of altering things favorably, he would leave give his younger self a more permanent connection to rose and leave a trail of bread crumbs for his other self to follow. Convincing the Tardis was not easy. After sitting in the vortex for months constantly barraging the Tardis with his permutations and theories and reminding her that it was she who had merged with Rose at the Game Station altering several timelines in the process and changing Rose forever and what that change could mean for the Tardis as well as him, she finally conceded to his plan. He very arrogantly strolled up to the console and with a snarky, “Of course I’m right,” began to implement the first step of re-writing time.  
  
The first part of the solution was a slight manipulation of some old friends at UNIT. Six words had toppled a prime minister. It wouldn’t take much more than that to arrange for the demise of Torchwood at Canary Wharf. As the Doctor set course, he smirked. Yvonne Hartman should thank him for arranging a substantially kinder demise than being cyberized. He landed the Tardis at UNIT headquarters in London and upon opening the door was greeted by a group of uniformed UNIT officers.  
  
A tall woman with a forceful personality and who was obviously the superior officer stepped forward. “Doctor, Captain Erisa Magambo,” she stated and saluted him.  
  
He rolled his eyes. “Oh, don’t do that,” he moaned annoyed. He’d almost forgotten how tied up in procedure this lot was. Of course, that could work to his benefit.  
  
“It is an honour to meet you, sir. I have been fully briefed on your status and activities,” she continued.  
  
“My status and activities?” he said and winced. “Well, you shouldn’t believe everything you’ve read…unless it’s good. Then, feel free to whatever,” he said, hands in his coat pockets and rocking back on his heels in a deceptively casual pose.  
  
Magambo relaxed only slightly while the four UNIT personnel behind her stayed at attention.  
  
“Doctor, your presence usually indicates alien incursion of Earth. Perhaps a debriefing is in order,” she said and indicated he hallway behind her.  
  
“Ahhh yes, a debriefing. Brilliant. Let’s do that. After you Captain,” he said, grinning and bouncing ready to get on with his plan to re-order time. He normally abhorred the military but this time they would serve his purposes instead of bumbling in and destroying anything he’d accomplished or making a bad situation worse. It was all bit exciting. He was so close to having his Rose back, he could taste it.  
  
Magambo led him down an somber, gray corridor to a conference room furnished with uncomfortable and boring furniture. He plopped down in one of the hard chairs, propped his trainer-clad feet on the bare table, tipped his chair back and grinned as he looked around. “Bit austere eh Captain? Could use some artwork, flowers, maybe a nice…”  
  
“Doctor,” Magambo interrupted. “The issue at hand? Should we be readying to dispatch troops? What is the threat?”  
  
He thunked the chair down along with his propped up feet. “The threat my dear Captain is domestic I’m afraid,” he said, now with a more serious demeanor.  
  
“Domestic?” she queried.  
  
“Oh yes, and quite deadly. I take it you are aware of Torchwood,” he drawled, staring at her with intensity, measuring her reaction. He needed to convince her without appearing to eager.  
  
Magambo gave little away. She sat perfectly erect and still on the opposite side of the table from him. “We are well aware of Torchwood. That situation is in hand,” she answered stiffly and with little emotion.  
  
“Is it?” he asked and smiled slightly. “You mean you lot are just gonna sit back while they set about collecting anything alien including technology and alien visitors, making weapons and keeping all the good toys to themselves. Not to mention, their little plan about ripping a hole in the universe endangering the Earth and having tea with the Cyberman, Daleks and a few more of assorted nasties.”  
  
Now he had Magambo’s attention. “Torchwood’s mandate is protect the British Empire from extraterrestrial threat, to capture you, Doctor, and to secure alien technology for Great Britain but I’m sure you are aware of this. UNIT keeps a close eye on their activities and have not deemed them a threat. Is this personal or do you have intelligence that contradicts our reports?”  
  
The Doctor just grinned at this. Oh but he was about to have some fun. Who knew rewriting time would be so amusing. She wore her military training like a mantel. It wouldn’t be too hard to push the right buttons and appeal to her sense of duty. He was also quite sure that Torchwood rubbed her the wrong way. “Oh Captain, where are you getting your information from? Yvonne Hartman might be singing the cause of Queen and Country but she has her own agenda. Is it personal to me? Wellll, they are trying to capture and dissect me so I suppose it is a bit personal. I mean wouldn’t it be personal to you?”  
  
“Doctor, do you or do you not have evidence against them?” Magambo, asked in hard military fashion.  
  
Again, he grinned at her. “Evidence, of course, loads of it. Hartman’s got warehouses of technology that could blow up the planet and she and her inept staff wouldn’t hesitate to punch the big red threatening button just to try and knick a bit of technology. They’re a danger due to their own greed and stupidity but if that’s not enough, how about that big laser they used to blow up the Sycorax after I had them sorted. I can’t believe UNIT’s not frothing at the mouth to get their hands on that!”  
  
“Doctor, none of what you’ve told me isn’t anything we don’t already know about or haven’t taken measures to neutralize. Is there anything else?”  
  
His grinned slipped and he stood up. “Neutralize?” he said sarcastically. “You think you’ve neutralized them do you?” he finished in a dark tone as memories of Canary Wharf and all the people who died not to mention Rose’s face as she flew toward the void flashed before his eyes. “Then you’re naive. I’ve seen what’s coming from them and what it will cost this world. They’re out there ripping a hole in the walls of this universe which is damaging a parallel universe as well and the people that live on that parallel Earth are none to amused by it. They will defend themselves, violently if necessary and all because you think you have Torchwood neutralized,” he spit out as he began to pace and exude a dark and angry energy. Magambo flinched at his tone and the look of the Oncoming Storm directed at her.  
  
“It doesn’t bother you that they perform live dissections on extraterrestrials that happen to accidently land here or that they’re hoarding technology that could wipe out half the planet or that maybe Torchwood has delusions of controlling the population because you’re so overconfident that they’re harmless! Let me tell you what will happen if you don’t stop this and I mean now, thousands will die in London alone and when I say die, I mean horribly. All because you stood silent and let it happen,” he lectured with a sneer at her. He was on a roll now as all the anger and frustration he felt at everything that had gone wrong since Canary Wharf began to roll out of him.  
  
“Doctor, Torchwood is….”  
  
He slammed his fist down on the table. “I don’t care what you think Torchwood is! I know what it is…a threat to not just this planet but this universe! You want proof? Here!” he shouted and aimed his sonic at a laptop sitting on a corner table which light up and data started flying across the screen. Magambo walked over to it and stared while the Doctor paced, angry that she was not listening and that UNIT could have taken action but didn’t. All of this could have been avoided if they’d gotten off their bureaucratic arses. He fumed, thinking that back in the day when Alstair was in charge, they would have charged in first and asked questions later. Who’d of thought he missed those days.  
  
Magambo called in Dr. Malcolm Taylor who at first gaped at the pacing angry Time Lord before Magambo shook him out of it and made him focus on the laptop. He immediately adjusted his glasses and stared intently at the information on the screen, soon becoming flustered. “Oh dear,” he muttered. “I mean this is very not good.”  
  
“Well now, perhaps there is a glimmer of hope that not everyone in UNIT is asleep,” the Doctor snarked. Magambo glared at him.  
  
Dr. Taylor turned. “Doctor,” he breathed and stared as if he couldn’t believe his eyes. “Oh I love you!”  
  
“Dr. Taylor, focus!” Magambo ordered.  
  
Dr. Taylor flustered a bit. “Yes, yes, yes, of course. Doctor, you have seen this?”  
  
“The Doctor provided us with this intelligence,” Magambo recited, staring at the Doctor.  
  
“Captain Magambo is correct, Dr. Taylor. I assume you understand what that is?” the Doctor asked, now speaking directly to Dr. Taylor. He could feel things shifting and there was a convergence of time lines around Malcolm Taylor. It was apparent that if he convinced Malcolm, then UNIT would act against Torchwood. He preened inside thinking what a gift it was that his key to success was someone who already fancied him.  
  
“This indicates that Torchwood One is built over a weak spot, a universal breach. Very dangerous that,” Dr. Taylor tells Magambo. “We’ve been monitoring energy spikes from Torchwood for some time but haven’t been able to determine what’s producing them. Well, until now. This is very bad. It appears that Torchwood has been firing particle engines at this weak spot as if they are trying to open it further than it is.”  
  
“Is it dangerous?” Magambo asked.  
  
“Yes, oh yes! It could rip apart the universe and kabloom! Blow us all up. That is, unless it’s controlled but that would be almost impossible.”  
  
“Almost?” Magambo asked.  
  
“It is impossible at your technological level,” the Doctor inserted. “Torchwood, unfortunately, is arrogant enough to think they can control anything. Their arrogance will destroy them and many more. You have to stop them,” the Doctor reiterated and might have given Magambo a slight telepathic push to take action.  
  
Dr. Taylor looked at Magambo. “I must agree with the Doctor. This is quite dangerous and combined with the information we have about some of the alien technology they have stored there…it’s most unwise. Not to mention, Yvonne Hartman…well she’s a little over zealous and not concerned about loss of life if it gets her what she wants.” He swallowed hard. “She… tried to recruit me once and it was a bit unpleasant. I don’t care to repeat that encounter.”  
  
“Recruit you?” Magambo asked with a raised brow. “When?”  
  
The Doctor couldn’t help his smirk. Oh this was what he was waiting for. Humans were so easy. They were creatures of such ego. There was nothing like a turf war between to governmental agencies to make things happen.  
  
Dr. Taylor looked very nervous and began fidgeting. “Yes, well I was told not to say anything or something bad may happen but it was a few months ago.”  
  
Magambo showed a great deal of annoyance. “I see.”  
  
The Doctor had to use every ounce of control not show his glee at this. He bet UNIT and Torchwood had a noninterference policy and good old Yvonne probably violated it many times. “You can’t trust Yvonne and things are not as neutralized as you think, Captain. I’m sorry but you are going to have to take control of this situation and it’s gonna be messy. Yvonne won’t go down without a fight and with all that alien technology at her disposal….wellll, you just stood back and let a power mad government bureaucrat become the best armed person on the planet!”  
  
“Oh my,” Dr. Taylor said, pulling his glasses off and cleaning them. “Captain, the Doctor is quite correct. Torchwood has things in their underground storage facility that would be bad if exposed to rift energy or most any explosives and we suspect they have far more than we know about. I’ve heard Ms. Hartman has a secret bunker that few know about or have survived seeing.”  
  
Magambo looked really annoyed now and turned to the Doctor. “Well Doctor, I don’t suppose you have an idea for solving this mess?”  
  
The Doctor grinned. He felt the time lines aligning just as he wanted them and all it would take is one more tiny little push. “Well Captain, I think that with Malcolm’s help, we might have a solution that would permanently neutralize Torchwood.”  
  
After that, things moved quickly. Magambo held meetings with her superiors, many of whom were chomping at the bit to take down Torchwood and appropriate any alien technology just as the Doctor knew they would. Torchwood had been a thorn in their side many times already. The Doctor helped Malcolm devise an implosion device which would level Torchwood One without activating any alien technology or causing a massive explosion that would take out London or the entire country. Of course, this still left the problem of causalities. Malcolm was concerned about Torchwood personnel but UNIT took the typical military approach, acceptable losses. They were willing to sacrifice a few for the greater good.  
  
Normally, this would make the Doctor sick but in this instance, he was secretly giddy at UNIT’s enthusiasm. Not that he could show it. After all, he didn’t want to raise suspicions. He even suggested they work with Jack Harkness to see this thing through. They resisted this. Apparently, Jack had a history with UNIT and none of it was good but the Doctor prevailed and UNIT finally agreed. A stray thought about using Jack this way might be wrong crossed his mind but he shrugged it off. Jack would be sorted with the rest of his companions. His manipulation of time was far reaching. His younger self would eventually cross paths with Jack but not yet. Rose had to be ready to accept who Jack was now. Ultimately, things would be righted with his temporally stunted companion. He knew he owed Jack and justified his manipulation of Jack in this as the ends justifying the means. Jack would get his answers earlier in this new time line.  
  
UNIT would work with Jack who the Doctor assured them would cooperate in taking down Yvonne as there was no love lost between Jack and Torchwood One. Jack would help them create a diversion that would require Yvonne to send off some of her personnel off site. Additionally, they would make sure there would be a test of Torchwood One’s security protocol’s requiring evacuation of the building of non-essential personnel. During this time, a few undercover operatives would place and activate the implosion devices.  
  
The Doctor stood back and watched it all come together. The only hiccup was when Alistair came to visit at UNIT. There had been one rather uncomfortable conversation when Alistair had questioned how easily the Doctor agreed to a plan that involved people dying. The Doctor’s response had been simple. “I’m so old, Alistair. I used to have so much mercy. I sacrificed billions to save the majority of life in the universe. I’m tired of watching the Yvonne Hartmans of the universe destroy lives for their own personal gain. Perhaps you’re right, I have changed and maybe it’s time for me to retire when standing by watching this becomes even a little easier.” In that moment, the Doctor had a slight doubt about what he was doing, but doubt was quickly pushed aside as the pain of his losses weighed on him and the potential time lines he saw forming filled him with excitement. He thought of Rose’s smiling face and feeling her hand in his and shrugged off those doubts.  
  
Alistair had nodded and eventually left, sorrow in his eyes when he looked at the Doctor. The Doctor looked back at him and thought, “He knows.” The Doctor left shortly thereafter and watched the timelines unfold on the Tardis as UNIT destroyed Canary Wharf. A huge grin lit his face when he realized it worked and that Torchwood One was nothing but a pile of rubble. They were no longer a threat to Rose and the events that allowed the Cybermen and Daleks to invade Earth wouldn’t happen. For the slightest moment, guilt stabbed at him for lives lost in Torchwood’s destruction but he shoved that guilt aside. Lives would have been lost anyway in that event and wasn’t his way less painful? It’s not like he couldn’t sort through the time lines of who lived and died to assure the universe stayed in balance. He knew what he was doing, he was the Time Lord Victorious.  
  
He shouted and danced around the console. “You see! Ha! I did it! I won! Now to finish,” he shouted, fist pumped the air and turned to complete his work. He had to solve any ruptures that resulted from this event and prevent the reapers from showing up. As he worked at determining which time lines needed to end to preserve universal balance, guilt once again assaulted him and made him pause. He looked up at the time rotor and whispered his sorrow to the universe and those that died at Canary Wharf. “I’m so sorry, but you…you would have died anyway.”  
  
He shook it off and continued. He needed to keep focused on his goal and after all any lives that were meant to be lost would still be lost, just in a different way. He would make it kinder than being cyberized or shot by a Dalek. As he saw to this, he conceded that this was the universe’s way in punishing him for trying to control things, by forcing him to oversee the deaths of these people who were never meant to survive Canary Wharf. He tamped down on his emotions. He couldn’t allow himself to wallow in guilt and despair. He’d done enough of that already. No, he had to focus. Although, there was one life in particular who would be affected by his manipulations and how to handle that particular quandry made him pause. It was a sacrifice that haunted him.  
  
During the time he worked at stabilizing timelines, the Tardis seemed to be on a nonstop tear at punishing him. He’d been on the receiving end of several burnt fingers, singed eyebrows, ripped clothing and hair that was still smoking from a small fire along with a never ending screeching in his head that was the Tardis version of nagging. He was a little miffed his own ship had so little faith in him. Once everything was stable, the Tardis seemed to act like it was all her doing which annoyed him. He knew his time was limited and soon his existence would cease now that his own personal time line was shifting. He had a few more things to do before that happened. It was time to pay a visit to Rose Tyler and he had just the moment from his past picked out. With a cocky grin he set the Tardis in motion and shouted out “Allons-y!”  
  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to who_in_whoville for betaing and for her encouragement and a big thank you to callistawolf who helped push me on this and was moral support when I got hung up. WARNING - EXPLICIT SCENE IN THIS CHAPT. This is a very timey wimey plot and I worked hard to convey that eliminating Canary Wharf and what he's doing changes everything that would have happened. Nothing is as it was. Also, what happens to Rose is part the plot but not the focus of this story. I won't say what it is here as I don't want to spoil you. Thanks for reading and your comments. Timey Wimey is hard to write so I appreciate your comments.

Rose wandered around the open air market pausing at various carts to examine the merchant’s wares. The Doctor had dashed off to meet with some renegade privateer who owed him a favor. He had explained that he couldn’t take Rose with him as females were considered merchantable goods and he didn’t want things to get complicated by someone hauling her off to make a profit. Rose had huffed her indignation at his casual mention of slavery. The Doctor promised her it all fell apart in a few years but until then, he wanted his jeopardy friendly companion as far from the slave market as possible. After her whinging a bit more about doing business with slavers, he’d promised her that it was necessary as this particular privateer had a supply of tharillian crystals which he needed for the Tardis and he wouldn’t be doing business with him if it wasn’t critical. He’d then shoved some currency in her hand and told her to be good and left.

Time Lord Victorious knew exactly when he wanted to intercept past Rose. It was right after they had helped Chloe Webber and had stopped off on the planet Mosh for some supplies and shopping. He remembered leaving Rose on her own perusing local goods. Excitement and anticipation made his hearts pound as he entered the marketplace and saw her. He thought his hearts would burst. There was a slight moment of guilt and worry at what he had done. The consequences of his actions still tugged at him and he knew he had to remedy them but…he needed to see her first. No, he needed more than to just see her. She was his muse and one moment with her would be all the inspiration he needed to fix any loose ends and assure their timelines meshed. He pushed aside the lingering doubts and strode forward toward her.

Just as she picked up an angora-like Tardis blue shawl, Rose felt as if the world shifted and shivers coursed down her spine. It was an odd feeling and slightly disorienting. The Doctor bounded up next to her, startling her out of her introspection.

“Doctor, that was fast. Seems like you just left,” Rose said as he pulled her into a hug and grinned as if they had just escaped death on some daring adventure.

“Oh, he was running a bit late so I thought I’d just spend some time with you until my nefarious vendor arrives,” he said, as he pulled back, grasping her hand. He began walking her away from the market and shooting furtive glances at her as if she was the center of his universe.

Rose walked with him wondering what was up. Something was off but couldn’t put her finger on what it was. “Doctor, is somethin’ wrong?” she asked as he tugged harder at her, walking them into the nearby woods.

“Wrong? What could possibly be wrong? Everything’s brilliant! Fantastic even,” he said and looked at her smirking as he continued to usher her into the woods.

“Okay, then why are we bookin’ it into the woods? Oh, did you nick somethin? Blow somethin’ up? You stopped the slave traders didn’t ya?” she asked, imagining all the things he could do to tick someone off and require a fast escape. Of course, if he wanted to escape, why was he pulling her into the woods? The Tardis wasn’t far from the market.

Finally, he stopped and stared deeply into her eyes, his hands resting on her shoulders. “Doctor?” she asked softly as she looked into his eyes and noticed the intensity, darkness and a sadness she’d not seen in him since he had blue eyes. “Please, tell me what’s wrong?”

His face softened. “Nothing’s wrong. As a matter of fact, everything’s perfect. Come on, I want to show you something. It’s not much further,” he said and pulled her through a grassy meadow towards more trees.

Rose stopped and wouldn’t budge. Something was wrong despite what he said and she wasn’t moving until he told her. She crossed her arms and stubbornly stared at him.

He dramatically rolled his eyes. “Blimey, but I forgot how obstinate you can be sometimes.”

“What’s goin’ on? Why are we in the woods? If something went wrong in the market, why didn’t we go back to the Tardis and whadda you mean you forgot how obstinate I am?” she asked pointedly and started paying closer attention. His hair was wrong. It was longer. Then, there was his tie. She swore he was wearing a different tie that morning.

He cursed internally for a moment. How could he have forgotten how clever she was. She knew and wouldn’t let him just babble his way out of this one. They didn’t have much time. The irony of the situation did not escape him. Still, he wasn’t going to waste this chance with her. He’d already wasted far too many other opportunities to show her how he felt.

Rose watched as he stared at her and was just waiting for the oncoming babble. Just as she was about to comment, she found herself in a fierce embrace and his lips crashing down against hers. At first she was shocked, but then as she found herself on the receiving end of one of the best snogs of her life, she melted into him. He was firm but gentle with soft kissable lips. She felt her heart racing as she was swept away by the swirl of emotions the kiss aroused in her. It was obvious from the way he clung to her and urgency of his kiss that he wanted more. She opened her mouth to beckon him in. He was just as clever with his tongue as she knew he would be and her toes curled with thoughts of what else he could what that tongue. She knew this was wrong though. He had never given any indication this would ever happen between them and yet it felt so right that she didn’t want it to stop. She did of course, as he may have a respiratory bypass, but she did not. When she pulled back gasping and looked into his eyes, they were almost black with passion.

“Not here,” he said gruffly and pulled her along with him through some trees until they walked out into a small enclosed meadow filled with tiny lavender flowers floating amongst a sea of fine green grass. It smelled fresh and sweet and alien all at the same time. He spread his coat out on the grass and held out his hand.

“I can’t believe I’m about to say this but, this isn’t right,” Rose said, looking at him closely. His tie was wrong. He had been wearing the swirly tie this morning, not a paisley one. There was more, it was the look in his eyes. They looked even more ancient and filled with some heavy burden.

“It’s never been more right than this,” He told her, his voice deepening.

It soon hit her. This was her Doctor but not from this time. He was from the future and by the looks of him, things were not going well. “You’re from the future. I mean a future point in time. You shouldn’t be here. You told me…”

“It doesn’t matter,” he interrupted her and grasped her hands. “All that matters is you and I, right here, right now. No more wasted moments. I wasted too much time already, Rose.”

“Oh gawd, I’m dead, aren’t I?” she gasped and felt tears springing to her eyes. She was gone and he was alone and missing her so he crossed his own timeline just to see her one more time. She couldn’t let him risk it, not for her.

“No, Rose. You’re not,” he told her adamantly. “We…that is to say I…”

“No, I wouldn’t leave you. I’m not gonna leave you ever,” she said emphatically. “If I’m not with you then something happened. I can see it in your eyes,” she said with a shaky voice and tears streaming down her face.

He pulled her to him and hugged her tightly to his chest. “Rose, don’t. Please, don’t. There’s not much time.” He pulled back and tipped her chin up so she was looking him in the eyes. “Things happened and I lost you. I did what I had to in order to keep you safe which meant losing you. Please, just don’t. I wasted so much time with you and I…I never told you. I need to tell you, Rose,” he said, his voice breaking.

“Tell me what? I don’t understand. You said I’m not dead. Why am I not with you then? What happened? What did you do? Please, Doctor. Tell me! I know I would never leave you,” she pleaded with him. Then it occurred to her. The Beast’s prophecy. “He said I’d die in battle. Is that it? Did you do something to save me, left me somewhere? Oh gawd, you sent me away didn’t you?” she looked up at him, accusation and fear in her eyes.

“I told you that thing in the pit was wrong!” the Doctor said vehemently with a hint of anger in his voice and then calmed down.

“But, you didn’t deny sending me away,” she accused in a shaky tearful voice. “It’d be just like you to do that.” The more she thought about it, the more it made sense to her. Something bad was going to happen and he sent her away, somewhere safe just like he did at the Game Station.

“Rose, please. We both know what happens when I send you away to keep you safe. You’re stubborn that way and so determined to put yourself in danger no matter what. If I sent you away, you’d come back unless… other things stopped you,” he said, thinking about Canary Wharf and how he’d tried to keep her safe and she came back, risking her life. At the time, part of him had felt his heart swell with the fact that she chose him over everyone else in her life and yet part of him had been angry. Her life was too important to risk for someone like him. He looked back at her. “Do you know what it would take for me to send you away, even to keep you safe? Do you? It would take everything in me and a piece of me would…”

“Would what?” Rose asked, tears cascading down her face as she faced him and watching as his face revealed more anguish than she had ever seen in him. That devastated look was all it took to break her. How could she be angry at him when he was clearly suffering? She threw her arms around him and held him to her, unable to bear seeing him suffer.

He gripped her tightly to him, relishing this contact, of having her here with him. “Rose Tyler, I don’t think you know how important you are to me. I’m such a coward that I….I never told you,” he rasped out.

Rose pulled back and looked into his eyes so filled with time and knowledge and pain and shook her head unable to comprehend what he was trying to say. “Tell me what?”

He smiled. “I love you. I love you, Rose Tyler,” he swore and once again crashed his lips against hers. Rose didn’t question it. She could feel his desperation and knew something horrible had happened and chances were there was nothing she could do about it but she could do this. If this wouldn’t happen between them in her present timeline, then she would embrace this. She kissed him back with every ounce of passion in her, her arms slipping beneath his jacket, her hands clawing at him through his oxford. He moaned and his own hands traveled down her back and pulled her closer hitching up one of her legs around his waist and she could feel his hard length rubbing against her leaving no doubt in her mind that he wanted her.

From that point forward, Rose Tyler ceased trying to think about how bad it was that he crossed his own time line or what had happened between them to bring him to this point of desperation. All she knew was that they were now tugging at each other’s clothing and snogging as if the universe were ending which it very well could be based on him being here now.

It wasn’t long before she was lying naked on his coat with a very aroused and desperate Doctor over her. He was everywhere, tongue laving her, teeth nipping at her driving her mad with want. Rose arched into him as she felt him sucking and nibbling her neck down her clavicle until he began lavishing attention on her breasts. “Doctor,” She gasped as she felt him envelop her nipple, dragging his teeth against her sensitive skin and his tongue teasing her taut nipple. She raked her nails across his lean, muscled back and tangled her fingers in his hair as he continued to lave attention down across her abdomen. She bit her lip as he dipped down between her thighs and she felt his tongue for the first time tracing her wet folds. “Oh my God, Yes!” she cried out arching up off his coat.

He smirked. “Not God, Doctor,” he growled and continued mapping out her body. He relished this, tasting and touching of every part of her. This was better than any fantasy he’d ever had. He drank her in and savored her, learning everything that made her moan and squirm against him. Through fingers and tongue he discovered what brought her pleasure until she was begging him for release. He smiled with pride as his fingers traced her folds and encircled that sweet bundle of nerves he knew would drive her over the edge and after watching her squirm and scream he swiped it with this tongue until finally closing his lips firmly down and humming against her until she clenched against his fingers and shouted his name.

When he crawled up to look at her, she was panting and smiling. “You think you’re so impressive,” she finally said when she had breath.

He grinned proudly. “I am so impressive and I will be even more impressive very soon.”

“Mmmm,” she hummed in agreement as she rolled over toward him to stroke his erection, her fingers lazily running up and down his length until he stilled her hand and looked at her intensely.

“Don’t you want me to…” she asked.

“I need to be inside of you,” he said in a passion roughened voice and pushed her back aggressively. He pulled her up to him and hitched her leg around his hip until he was poised at her entrance.

“Look at me,” he commanded. Rose stared into his eyes and saw such raw need, it pulled at her. No one had ever looked at her that way before. She felt him pulling at her and wondered if this was a Time Lord telepathic thing. Soon his forehead was against hers and he was pushing into her.

Rose gasped. “Is this all right?” he asked and stared at her, willing her to understand what he was asking.

She nodded her head in ascent and felt their bodies begin to move together and felt a presence around her. It was strange but familiar at the same time. She was there with him but she was many places and many points in time as well. He was sweeping her up into himself and the symphony that was time as he experienced it. As he moved inside of her, she felt the physical pleasure of how he filled her, his skin sliding against hers, the slap of their flesh, the tangy taste of his skin as she bit his shoulder, and the heat building within her. But, it was more than that. There was a pulsing beat of their minds and she visualized herself in a nightclub feeling how the music thrummed through her body as she moved to that beat. This was dancing and it was incredible and beyond anything she might have imagined.

The Doctor felt himself slide into her tight heat and gritted his teeth from the pleasure of being inside of her. Her consent to enter her mind was the culmination of what he wanted. To be surrounded by Rose body and mind was a heady experience. He tried to maintain control but it was growing increasingly difficult. The little minx was doing things to him telepathically with her heated thoughts and thrumming music inside her head. As his movements became more urgent and he entwined their minds, something else became clear to him. It was her timeline. He’d never seen it so clear and it soon became evident that there was more to Rose than he imagined. It was almost like he could see Bad Wolf imprinted on her mind. This was the Tardis’ doing.

His Tardis had altered her to achieve their merging to save his Ninth self from the Daleks. He saw a potential timeline burst forth that he had not anticipated and then more timelines, many alternatives. He gasped as it almost became too much for him and he felt them edging toward completion. They would do this together. He had rolled her on the ground until they were laying amongst the flowers and grass and the pulse of life of this place ebbed and flowed around them. He felt time flowing around them, drawn to them almost fixating on them as he grunted and strained against her. He felt himself slipping, losing control as the two of them shouted out their completion in that one shining moment when he felt her clench around him as he spilled himself inside of her. He spontaneously drew timelines into them and then they snapped back out as they both spasmed and screamed.

As he slumped down on top of her, he knew with certainty that what he had done and all the carefully laid out plans he had made, had very serious consequences. He looked down at her relaxed, smiling face. She murmured she loved him and drowsily fell asleep.

Tears filled his eyes. “I love you,” he gasped as he felt the universe convulse and strain as a result of their joining. He pulled out of her and sat back looking down at Rose’s sleeping form. It was too late to stop what was happening now. It was done. He ran his fingers gently over her abdomen. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” he whispered as he felt a new life begin to form inside of her. He had wanted this to happen but now he saw the significance and a terrible choice that would have to be made. He couldn’t regret this. Having that moment with her was more than he had hoped but it was shadowed by something dark on the horizon.

He had been so sure this was the answer. He knew his younger self would never understand what he had done to save himself and Rose a painful separation, to save Martha and her family from being tortured and to save Donna. He would know none of that. Memories of how he had been with Rose before Canary Wharf and how afraid he was of tarnishing her were still fresh in his mind. His younger self would be horrified by his actions today, not understanding the horrors that were in his future if these things hadn’t been done. This was the only way to assure Rose would be with him, be there to hold his hand and stop him. His younger self would resist, try and send her home once he learned of what had been done. He snorted as he thought about how his younger self would see this as a sign he was dangerous and would ruin Rose. He would prove to his younger self this was the only way. He knew that younger him could never leave Rose now. He would never abandon her knowing a part of himself was carried within her.

Let his younger self hate him. It wasn’t like he didn’t already carry around an abundance of self-hatred anyway. Even now after all of this and everything he’d done to make things better, he still knew he would never be good enough for Rose. But, that was why he needed her so badly. She made him better. This tiny bit of life inside of her would assure his younger self’s commitment to Rose. As much as he would want to run from her, he never would be able to completely run from her now. Guilt weighed heavily on him as he gazed down at her. He wondered how much she would hate him. She was Rose though, so he could never believe she would hate him forever. She was strong and would love this child and therein was the blessing and the problem.

Unforeseen consequences seemed to be the phrase of the day and that’s what he had to solve now. He had hoped Rose’s pregnancy would not only bind his younger self to her but solve the minor detail that she was not meant to exist in this universe after what was to have happened at Canary Wharf. Gestating a Time Lord’s child would cause a complicated event in time and space. It would was tricky, but he planned on bending timelines around her to integrate her into this universe. Unfortunately, it didn’t quite work that way. The universe had convulsed with the stress of Rose’s existence and the existence of an impossible child. This could have a calamitous result. He would need the Tardis to confirm but, the universe might reject the child. Tears came to his eyes as he thought about this, what it meant to lose another child or worse, for Rose to lose her child.

He clenched his hands in anger of the unfairness of this. An inner rage built at how the universe continued to punish him. Rose murmured something in her sleep and he gazed back down at her and felt all that rage ebb away. Still, he wouldn’t regret his time with her. He would have to find a solution and he needed to work quickly. His timeline would come to an end soon enough, he could feel it. Canary Wharf was like a pebble thrown into a pond and the ripple effect of that alteration of his timeline would mean he would no longer exist and that ripple was closing in on him. He didn’t have much time left to do what must be done.

Rose couldn’t remember this. She and his younger self needed time together without the burden of his actions weighing them down. They would only grow closer and he knew that was important. By the time he ended, Rose’s body would reveal their child. He would have to deal with his younger self on that point and already had a plan in mind. More importantly though, he had to deal with the significance of this child. As he dressed, he went over the calculations in his mind and cursed himself that it had never occurred to him what the Tardis had done to Rose at the Game Station or what that would mean to his plan. He needed to get back and solve this but first things first. He had to sort Rose so she would be unaware of any of this and slip her back into the market as if none of this had happened. When events were in place, she would remember what had happened here and being with him.

He suspected she would not be happy having her memories suppressed so he gave her no choice justifying it to himself that it was for the good of the timelines. He touched her temple to push her into a deeper sleep so he could dispose of the evidence of their afternoon together. Her mind was strong and it wasn’t easy but a few implanted subconscious messages and a slight gentle push and he was able to suppress the memories. Tears ran down his face as he did it. She would be angry at first but he had embedded a message from this him to her. He didn’t tell her everything but made clear what would have happened and why he’d done this and how much he loved her. He hoped that this would be enough for her to forgive him and embrace the opportunity for a life with younger him.

He carried her out of the woods and left her not far from the market, napping in the sun. He laid a gentle kiss on her forehead and whispered he loved her one more time before reluctantly leaving. Other him would be here soon and he couldn’t risk him being aware of his future self’s presence. Once back in the Tardis, he felt his ship’s panic and heard the constant tolling of the cloister bells warning of the impending universal destruction. This just confirmed things were bad and he needed a solution. He worked diligently on several options but nothing seemed to solve anything. It wasn’t just the child he had to worry about. There was one other timeline he had been diligently trying to manipulate in order to preserve it but his solution was tentative and precarious. Somehow, the child’s existence had now become tangled with this other timeline until one affected the other. He still didn’t understand why or how other than this was some new way the universe had to torture him.

During his time spent in the Vortex working on untangling this problem, he felt the temporal ripples approaching. It was like turbulence in the vortex as they neared and served to remind him his time was short. He set coordinates to land hoping the effects would be lessened out of the Vortex. As he began the landing sequence, he felt his Tardis calm almost like she was resigned to whatever she felt happening. He stared at the time rotor when he felt this. “What do you know?” he asked, but the Tardis remained silent. “The universe is falling apart. Cracks are starting to appear and reapers might not be far behind. This should be affecting you!” he shouted at his ship which still did not respond to him. He pulled at his hair as he paced and then stopped and turned slowly around to look at the time rotor. They had landed and it was not a typical landing. It had been quiet and soft almost like she was anticipating what was ahead for him and was trying to be kind. He walked over to find out where they were but she had shut down the readings as if she didn’t want him to know but he already knew that where ever they were, it was near an epicenter of the universal cracks. A sinking feeling almost overwhelmed him and he walked slowly to the door. When he opened it, his fears were confirmed.

Jackie Tyler walked out of her kitchen and found the Tardis parked in her living room and the Doctor staring at her from the doorway of his Tardis. “Well, don’t just stand there and how many times have I told you not to park that thing in front of my telly!” she chastised him. She sighed, shook her head and made her way toward the kitchen. “Come on, I’ve just put the kettle on and tell Rose to leave her laundry by the door,” she called out.

The Doctor swallowed hard and exited the Tardis.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of angst! Seriously lots of angst. The next chapter will be a little better but there will still be angst. Jackie Tyler is awesome. There is nothing greater than a mother's love.

The Doctor sat at Jackie’s tiny table, rubbing his still-red jaw from where Jackie had slapped him. He should have known better than to flippantly tell Jackie, “Oh, well, Rose is with off other me doing things, I think.”

Jackie had shouted, “You think! I’ll give you, you think!” and then she’d smacked him.

He’d babbled that he was sure she was fine after Jackie chased him around the apartment with a broom and had explained he was from the future. Jackie had calmed and ordered him to sit and tell her everything. So there he sat miserable and trying to think what to say to her while shooting his Tardis angry looks. Jackie sat down, poured tea and squinted her eyes at him in a pointed Jackie Tyler glare. She even withheld the plate of jammy dodgers from him, waiting on him to give her an explanation.

He couldn’t help but quirk a smile. Jackie and he had their differences, but he’d developed a fondness and respect for her. She raised Rose, after all, and did it on her own with little help from anyone. Rose wouldn’t be who she was without Jackie. He’d often complained about bringing Rose home for visits, but truth was, he was a bit fond of Jackie’s tea and fussing. Despite giving him a hard time, she’d accepted him as part of Rose’s life and made him feel part of the family and…he missed her. Seeing her like this brought back fond memories.

“Don’t give me that smile, Mister. You’re not gonna charm your way out of this one. Now tell me what happened and where’s Rose!” Jackie snapped at him.

Sufficiently chastised and remembering what he’d been doing before he’d arrived here as well as how Jackie played into things, his smile faded. “It’s very complicated,” he said and stared at his tea.

“I don’t care! You’re s’pose to be the brilliant alien. Figure out a way to explain it to me, and you better end with Rose is fine,” Jackie said in a clipped voice and took a sip of her tea, never letting up on her angry glare at him.

He reached back and nervously scratched his neck and finally let out a defeated sigh and looked her in the eyes and that was what broke him. “I…I’ve done something I shouldn’t and…” he told her with an emotion-filled voice, pausing to swallow hard.

“What do you mean? What’ve you done? Where’s Rose? You said she was with other you. What does that mean?”

He looked up at her. “That’s just the point. I lost her and you, and I’m all on my own now,” he said and stared out across the room, not looking at anything, a devastated look on his face. He turned back to Jackie, whose previous anger had vanished, replaced by shock and something else he couldn’t determine. Maybe it was a hint of sympathy or pity.

“How did you lose us?” she asked, her voice softening slightly, her hands gripping her tea cup as if it was a life preserver.

He sighed. “Something bad happened, and I sent you both away to another Earth in another universe to be safe. Somewhere the two of you could have a new start and a good life, but I couldn’t follow. But Rose, she wasn’t happy there. She became everything I knew she could be and more, a defender of the Earth.” He looked at Jackie and smiled slightly. “Magnificent, she was, and determined. That’s a quality of you Tyler women. She tore her way back to me, even though it should have been impossible. She did it and so did you.”

“So you just sent us away from our home then?” Jackie asked, sounding annoyed.

“I promised I would keep her safe and bring her home to you,” he answered, his eyes darkening with irritation. There were times he cursed that promise. “It wasn’t safe here. I…arranged for you to be on another Earth where the two of you could have a better life and be safe.”

“And you thought you could just chuck my daughter out and she’d accept it pretty as you please? You really are an alien, aren’t you, and not half as brilliant as you pretend to be,” she said, shaking her head. “Anyone can see how my Rose feels about you and knows she’d shatter time itself to keep you safe. She did that once before when you sent her away, didn’t she. She told me a little about it. I’m sure not everything, but enough to scare me. Not that I could keep her from you. I could see the look in her eye. Especially, after you changed your face and all that.” She sighed. “You said we came back, but you said you’re alone now. What happened?”

He stared at Jackie. He wasn’t expecting her to say that. She’d known all along how much Rose loved him and she talked about it like she accepted it. He gathered his thoughts and continued. “Bad things happened. Dangerous things. Things that reminded me how dangerous my life had become after I lost Rose. Dangerous, not just for Rose but for anyone who traveled with me. I was afraid, afraid for Rose, afraid to travel with anyone. I lost…friends or being with me ruined their lives, hurt their families and it was too much. I sent you and Rose back and made sure you couldn’t return,” he told her, leaving out the details about Pete and his metacrisis. After all, none of that would happen now and that timeline was all but extinguished.

Jackie looked at him sadly. “You stupid, stupid git of an alien,” she said, shaking her head in sympathy. “As much as I’m grateful that you sent us away to keep us safe, you should know how much she loves you and how sending her away would hurt her.” She pushed the plate of jammy dodgers at him. “So, what else have you done? You said you’d done something bad.”

He reached for one of the jammy dodgers and stared at it for a long time before answering. When he did, his eyes were dark and tinged with madness and despair. “I broke the rules of time. I saved someone who should have died and… I went back in time and stopped things that would have hurt you and Rose. I re-wrote time so it wouldn’t happen, so I wouldn’t have to send you away.”

Jackie sat up and stared at him, now feeling more than concern. She could see that he was on the edge and this wasn’t something that was just bad. Even she with the little knowledge she had from what Rose had told her knew he had crossed a line. “Rose told me that some things couldn’t be changed, that she had tried to save Pete’s life and nearly destroyed the world. Is that what this is? Did you bloody well muck things up and now we’ll all die!” she shouted at him.

“No!” he shouted back at her, annoyed. “I am a Lord of Time!” he announced pompously and stood up and started pacing back and forth in her small dining room. “I know what I’m doing. I’ve made changes before in small ways so it’s not like it’s hard and I put a lot of thought into this, took into consideration variables you could barely conceive of. What I did, saved some people from a horrible death, more horrible than you can imagine. I stopped evil before it started so don’t lecture me. I won’t be judged by someone who doesn’t have an inkling of what it means to bear the weight of universe or oversee the destiny of countless of races.”

Jackie stood up and walked over to him, refusing to be intimidated. “Oh, yeah, Mr. Lord of all Time and Space,” she said with attitude and pointed her finger into his chest. “I may not have thousands of years of alien smarts,” she continued while he winced at thousands. “But I’ve been around you enough to know when you’re tryin’ to blow smoke up my arse and pretend everything’s okay when it isn’t! You think you’re all that cause you fly around time and space in that blue box of yours. Well, you aren’t. Maybe you’ve forgotten but you came here lookin’ like someone stole all your bananas and were one sorry, lost little alien. So don’t you try denyin’ that there’s some mess brewin’ out there and you’re here with your tail between your legs lookin’ for answers. So, why don’t you try again and tell me what the hell you did?”

The Doctor was speechless which didn’t happen very often. He squeezed his eyes shut and opened them but she was still there giving him the famous Jackie Tyler glare and waiting for an answer. He deflated. “I changed things so I stopped something from happening, something that took Rose away and killed part of the population in London. It was bad, Jackie. But you see, there’s only so much I can change. Certain people, their timelines weren’t meant to exist after the event. I had to make sure they didn’t or find some other way to get the universe to accept their presence.”

Jackie backed away from him and sat down hard in her chair. “You mean you had to kill them,” she said and covered her mouth with her hand in horror of what she’d just said.

“No! It’s not like that!” he swore emphatically. “Not exactly, anyway,” he said and shoved his hands in his pockets and slumped his shoulders. “If they were meant to die, I couldn’t change it without destroying this world or universe. I redirected their timelines. Some still died due to what I did to stop things. Some were lucky enough to have a little more time. None died the horrible death they would have. Car accidents, medical conditions and every day little dangers took their lives. They died as they would have anyway to keep the universe in balance. I couldn’t change this and I had to oversee it. Can you imagine that, Jackie? Having to watch every one of those timelines be snuffed out?” he asked, sounding old and tired. Jackie just stared at him in horror, now understanding what he had endured to keep she and Rose here, to keep Rose with him. It was a horrible sacrifice.

“Before, I didn’t even know who they were. They were just faceless victims who were murdered by creatures let loose on London by a bunch of power mad humans who were willing to sacrifice innocent lives to achieve some new level of technology. That’s what I stopped, Jackie. The first time, I showed up too late and lost you and Rose. This time I stopped it before it could get that far,” he explained with a look of sadness and desolation on his face.

“I’m sorry,” Jackie whispered, watching him and waiting for him to fall apart. He looked like he was ready to crumble from the weight of it.

He looked over at her and smiled slightly. “Thank you.”

“So you’ve done this thing and the world’s still here, I’m here and Rose is still here. “Why aren’t you happy?”

He walked over and sat down opposite here and looked down at his now cold tea and then back at her, his eyes ancient and weighted. “Because it wasn’t that simple. You and Rose weren’t meant to be here. I had to find a solution and it meant I had to do something that…” he said and didn’t finish.

“Do what? Is Rose all right?” she demanded, worrying about what he’d done to her.

“Rose is fine. I saved her but…there was a cost.”

“What do you mean cost? What cost!” she demanded, her emotions running high. If he was this upset, things must be bad.

“I crossed my own timeline and went back to see her so that I could tell her…that is to say so we could…. I mean, she and I had never… Well, we were together but not in that way…so I sort of told her how I felt and well. Ummm, we sort of shagged and she’s pregnantandgonnahaveababy,” he spat out really fast and then waited for the oncoming slap.

“WHAT!” Jackie shouted at him.

“I...I made love to her and we are, um, expecting,” he said, wincing and tugging at his ear.

Jackie’s face flushed red, and her eyes narrowed at him. “Let me get this straight. You and my daughter traveled together for years but never did so much as hold hands so you decided after losing her to go back and not just tell her how you feel or snog her but shagged her and knocked her up with your alien baby!” she said, the tone and level of her voice escalating.

“Wellll, not exactly like that. I mean, there was snogging at first that led to the, uh, you know, and then there was a baby or the beginnings of a baby,” he said nervously. “But I had to! It was going to save her life so she could stay in this universe. Gestating a Time Lord child made her complicated and the universe would shift around her.”

Jackie sat back and rolled her eyes. “Oh, don’t give me that! How stupid do you think I am?” she shot back at him. “And that is not an invitation to tell me. I think you’ve worked your gob enough already. Just tell me that Rose is safe, or I won’t be responsible for what’ll happen to that face of yours, and I don’t mean just slappin’ this time.”

His eyes widened, and he looked actually nervous. “Yes, Rose is safe,” he answered, but Jackie could tell he was holding something back.

“Rose is safe but something’s still wrong,” she said and then it hit her. “It’s the baby, isn’t it? Somethin’s wrong with the baby,” she said and felt tears welling. She hadn’t even seen Rose pregnant, much less seen evidence of a baby, but she still felt a connection. This was to be her first grandchild. Alien or no, it was part of Rose which meant it was part of her too. He looked gutted and that terrified Jackie. “Tell me the truth,” she demanded with a hitched voice.

He swallowed hard, not wanting to tell her but he supposed this was why he was here. He needed to tell someone. “The baby’s presence did affect Rose’s timeline and stabilized it so she can stay but it destabilized another timeline. Trying to keep a timeline in this universe that wasn’t meant to be here is tricky business. A complicated unique creature like my child caused a stress to time and space with unforeseen circumstances and now everything’s in jeopardy. There are cracks forming, and it’s only a matter of time before the universe implodes.”

“Oh, gawd, you’re sayin’ the baby has to die or the whole bloody thing crashes around us!” she gasped in horror. She could barely comprehend that this innocent baby who had done nothing more than been conceived could cause the end of everything. Jackie thought that losing Pete had been painful but that was nothing compared to what she was feeling now, thinking about the loss of this child and the pain it would inflict on Rose. “There’s got to be somethin’ you can do to stop this. You caused this now you have to fix it!” she demanded with tears in her eyes.

“It’s not that simple!” he shouted miserably, his head in his hands. “The baby’s timeline is tangled up with someone else's. One or the other of them needs to end.”

“Does Rose know about this?” Jackie asked.

“No. She doesn’t even know she’s pregnant. I suppressed her memories of what happened between us. At least, for now. She’s still with younger me. They’re not ready for this. They need more time together, time that I have now given them. It won’t be long before she knows and remembers. She’ll be angry with me. I accept that but I made sure she understood why I did it and she’ll remember that too. I had hoped by the time she found out about the baby that I would have found a solution to this,” he said, sounding sad and worn out.

Jackie just shook her head, unable to comprehend him. “How could you not tell her?” she asked. “Rose has a right to know. You can’t just knock her up and then make decisions about her baby without askin’ her! And what about this other timeline person?”

He sighed. “Jackie, Rose is with younger me. I can’t interfere in that any more than I have. She’s with me and she will be safe. I’m trying to solve this to save the baby so she doesn’t ever have to bear that burden. As for the other person, I…don’t know. I’d rather not burden her either if I don’t have to, and I need to get moving on this and solve it quickly. My time is running short.”

“What do you mean, your time is running short? What about my grandbaby and the end of everything?”

He looked pale, tired and drained. “I ended the timeline that resulted in this me. When I prevented the event that took Rose from me, it changed my personal future so that this me doesn’t happen. I’ll become someone else. Hopefully with Rose, I’ll be better. This version of me will disappear as if I never existed.”

This was almost too much for Jackie to comprehend other than for her to be horrified by it. “You mean you’ll die?”

“Nothing quite that dramatic. I’ll just fade away. I won’t have existed. Time is catching up with me and when it does, poof, no more this me. So you see, I have to sort this now.”

“But if you don’t exist, how will you have done all this? That don’t make sense,” Jackie said, looking confused.

He smiled softly at her. “Brilliant, you are, Jackie Tyler,” he said, nodding at her. “I’m a Time Lord, a complicated temporal being. The rules that apply to you don’t to me. Rose touches herself as a child, there are reapers devouring the Earth but me…I meet my prior self and the universe doesn’t end. It’s a Time Lord perk, you might say.”

Jackie nodded her head even though she really didn’t understand any of it. However, she did understand a pregnant daughter, grandchild in danger, and end of the universe. “So this other person, she’s going to have to die then? What about her, does she have a choice?”

The Doctor stared at Jackie for a long time. “I’d rather solve this so that she doesn’t have to make that choice. I can’t…” he started to say and his voice broke.

Jackie looked at him and somehow understood without him saying it. “You said that you sent Rose and I away to keep us safe that neither of us was here,” she said as the full implications settled on her. “It’s me, isn’t it? The baby is tied to me, and both of us can’t be here,” she said softly as tears rolled down her face.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Jackie,” he said softly and emphatically. “I never meant for any of this to happen. I don’t want this to happen.”

“But it has happened, hasn’t it,” she said quietly. “It’s happenin’ right now.”

He nodded his head and said nothing, feeling like he was about to shatter. Losing Rose had been horrible, painful to the point where he almost didn’t want to go on but losing Jackie like this due to his own cockiness and stupidity would be a whole new level of pain. Rose would hate him and the thought of all of this crushed him. There was no ego, no pompous all-knowing Time Lord. There was just him who thought he could bend time to his will and now was facing the ultimate punishment, his own private hell.

“How long?” Jackie asked with little emotion.

“I can fix this, Jackie. I will!” he swore even though he didn’t know if he could.

She looked at him and he saw a depth and intelligence in her eyes that he felt he had missed any other time he’d seen her. “I know you’ll try, but you wouldn’t be here if you thought it was fixable now would you.”

“No,” he denied. “It’s not like that. The epicenter of the cracks, they’re here, and I…”

“Don’t give me that! You and I know better. Just tell me, do you love my daughter?”

“How can you ask that?” he retorted.

“Just answer me and stop tryin’ to talk your way out of it. Just say it!”

“Yes,” he answered and looked down.

“And will you take care of her and the baby, make sure they’re safe and not alone, have a stable life?”

“Jackie, please don’t do this,” he begged.

“Just answer me!” she demanded.

“This me won’t, but younger me will never abandon them. I know how he feels. Protecting Rose and the baby will be his priority. I… young me couldn’t leave them if he wanted to. He’s a better man than this me is. He has Rose. Rose and I were always better together. It’s why I did all this.”

Jackie nodded. "These cracks, they’re here now, aren’t they. They’re already affectin’ me. I’ve been havin’ dreams and hearin’ things.”

He pulled out his sonic and scanned the apartment and focused on one wall. A jagged crack with white light oozing out was there. He backed away from it. Jackie came up beside him. “What’s in it?”

“Don’t touch it. Stay away from the wall. That is two parts of space and time that should never have touched, pressed together. It’s a result of what I’ve done.” He waved his sonic over it again. “Impossible. It’s fluctuating and made up of the very fabric of space-time. If you moved that wall, the crack would still be there. If you touch it…well, you would fall into time or be reintegrated as the universe needed but you wouldn’t be Jackie Tyler. She would be gone.”

“So if I touch it, I’ll die?” she asked.

He soniced it and the crack vanished from her sight. “You’re not touching it so don’t get any ideas. I’m fixing this, Jackie.”

“And what if you can’t?” she asked, hands on hips. “Do you think I’m just gonna stand here and let my grandbaby die? Well, I’m not. I don’t know how long that thing’s been there but I can guess. It’s been calling me a while now with dreams and voices.”

“Jackie, whatever you’ve been experiencing, it’s not real,” he said, concerned that she was embracing this thing and letting it influence her.

“I dreamed about him. My grandson. You were there too. I saw the three of you together. You said that thing was made up of time and it was leaking. Well, you’re right and it showed me my grandson. I was never in any of those dreams. It was always him and Rose and you and you were happy. But, it was more than that. I can hear my Pete too. He comforts me. It’s brought me some peace of mind here while Rose was travelin’ with you.” He stared at her as if she had lost it. “Oh, don’t look at me like that! I’m not about to jump off a building or anything. It’s just, if it’s my time, then it’s my time, and I won’t sacrifice my grandson to fight it. You understand?”

He nodded his head but was running calculations and scenarios at the same time. He had to save her.

“Now tell me, how will I know when I’m out of time? Will I see Rose before it’s too late?” she asked.

He stared at her, not wanting to have to tell Jackie when she would cease to exist. Jackie Tyler was one of the bravest, noblest people he had ever met. It was criminal and unfair that her life would be forfeit over his stupidity. She shouldn’t have to pay this price.

“Jackie, I….” Before he could finish, he winced and fell over in pain.

“What is it? What’s wrong” she asked.

“My timeline, it’s ending. I’ve been fighting it, trying to slow it down but I can’t for much longer. I have to go. I have to try and fix this before it’s too late.”

Jackie helped him up and over to his Tardis. “If you can’t, I don’t want you to mope around bein’ guilty and do something daft. Just take care of my Rose. You make sure that younger you gets it right. But Doctor, if you can fix this, do it! I want to at least see Rose one more time. Am I clear?”

“Yes,” he answered and rushed over and hugged her, squeezing her almost until she winced. “Thank you,” he whispered and then ran back into his Tardis.

As it dematerialized. Jackie turned toward the wall and stared at it. She listened to some faint whispers drifting from the wall comforting her. She smiled and whispered back, “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I know what to do.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still some angst but less of it. Ten and Rose realize what TLV has done and have to deal with what he did and what it means to them and the universe.

The Doctor was setting course for the planet Szarac when he was hit with a wave of disorientation and vertigo causing him to fall to his knees gripping his head. At first, he wondered if he had been infected by whatever was making Rose sick. She’d been feeling ill for a while now and the last two days had been brutal for her. Seeing how drained she looked, he’d sent her to bed. He had been a little concerned about her since the planet Mosh when he’d noticed that something was a little off but they had become distracted with another adventure and he had shrugged it off as nothing. The last few months had been some of the best they’d had since traveling together. They’d solved the riddle of Great Canarakian Sloth and helped reunite the lost tribe of Xebok with the rest of their civilization and freed the fuzzy N’Pel from slavery. Of course, there were the typical set backs and evil dictators that caused some problems but they sorted them eventually. Rose had become violently sick on Vot Prime but had seemed to recover until they were back in the Vortex and then she lost her appetite and was again ill. It had been a series of ups and downs with her ever since. 

What he was experiencing now, although mimicking some of Rose’s symptoms, was different. He was sure this was his time sense. Something was causing his time sense to palpitate. He took a few calming breaths and then as quickly as it started, the disorientation stopped. He stood up and did a quick self check but couldn’t find anything wrong. He shrugged it off and went back to work. His Tardis, on the other hand, was not so quick to ignore his physical ailment. She refused to budge.

The Doctor glared at the time rotor. “Oh come on! Don’t give me safety protocols! I’m fine, fit as a fiddle, as in nothing wrong. I don’t feel a day over two hundred,” he informed the Tardis, trying to get her to disengage this particular protocol. Finally, he sighed and pouted. “Fine, I’ll go to med bay and run a scanner on myself,” he grumbled and then left mumbling about “stupid Time Lord safety protocols," the whole way. 

He found Rose in med bay slumped over on a chair. “Rose!” He ran over to where she was sitting and looking miserable and knelt down by her side. “I thought you were going to lie down?” he said softly.

“I was but I started feelin’ sick. I was hopin’ to find somethin’ for this nausea. I’m tired but I’m so sick I can’t sleep,” she moaned to him.

He looked at her pale face and was growing more concerned. This had gone on too long. He gently cupped her cheek noting her temperature seemed normal. “You don’t have a fever but that doesn’t mean you haven’t been infected with something. The Tardis alters your immune system to protect you against any serious virus or bacteria you might come up against while exploring. I suppose you could have ingested something. Let me run and scan and see if you brought any extra passengers on board,” he said and began to work on a scanner.

“Extra passengers?” Rose said and winced. “Please don’t tell me something crawled inside of me for a ride.”

He turned around smiling with what she assumed was the scanner although it looked like an old fashioned hand radio with a small satellite dish attached to the top of it. “Oh, no worries! I’ll sort out any parasite that decided to get friendly with you! Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Rose sat up and stared at him in worry and annoyance. “Whadda you mean not the first time?”

“Oh, Sarah Jane had a little run in with this sentient mold spore that sort of nested in her ear. A bit odd that, but fascinating. Who knew the human ear was the perfect incubator for their first growth stage. Not that Sarah Jane appreciated that,” he babbled as he worked on setting the device in his hands.

“Doctor!” Rose exclaimed in horror. 

He turned at looked at her “What?” he asked innocently. Rose glared. “Oh it wasn’t that bad!” he said. “Really, humans can be so sensitive. I mean the mold spore had a right to….”

“Don’t you even!” Rose said, interrupting the babble. “Just check me out and make sure there’s no spore things or you know passengers,” she said, wincing as another wave of nausea hit her.

“Right,” the Doctor said, growing more concerned over the way she slumped down in the chair. He pointed the scanner at her and began running it down her body. He made another pass and then a third one and stepped back toward a work area and stared at the device.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Rose asked, concerned at how tense and silent he was. He was obviously upset. “Doctor, tell me! Is it them spore things?” she asked, panic in her voice.

“No, not spores,” he said in a cold voice. “A different kind of passenger.”

“What?” she asked, now truly panicked. “Whadda you mean? What is it? Can you get it out?”

He turned and leaned against the counter staring at her with a hard look in his eyes. “Oh it will come out all right in approximately seven Earth months.”

“Seven months!” Rose shouted. “I’m not waitin’ seven months! Can’t it come out now?”

“Well, I guess you should have thought about that before you acted irresponsibly,” he snipped, looking at her as if she had committed some heinous crime.

Rose was shocked. Why was he getting stroppy with her? “Acting irresponsibly? Exactly how did I act irresponsibly?”

“You know very well what you did and now you’re paying the price. Who was it? It’s been too long to be Mickey. Exactly when and where did you decide to sample some of the local flavor? I’ll need to know so you can tell the father unless that doesn’t matter to you?” he said cruelly.

“Father?” Rose gasped, shocked. “What…what do you mean? I didn’t sample anything. What are you talkin’ about? Why are you actin’ this way? What’s wrong with me?” she demanded, tears sprouting to her eyes.

“There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re perfectly healthy for a human woman two and half months pregnant. The question is why? Why now Rose?” he asked coldly and with accusation. He was hurt. Even if he didn’t have that type of relationship with her, surely she knew how he felt and he was sure that she felt the same way. It stung that she had betrayed him this way.

Rose was shocked. “What?” she breathed. “But that’s not possible. I can’t be pregnant. I haven’t…I haven’t shagged anyone not for ages, not since…. Not since before you regenerated,” she said in shock and fear. She looked down at her stomach and felt even more sick. She looked back at him standing there staring coldly at her with condemnation in his eyes.

“I suppose I should have expected this. It is human instinct after all, the need to reproduce. I would have expected you to wait until you were on Earth at least. You know how dangerous it is consorting with different species. He could have hurt you whoever this was,” he said, anger creeping out in his voice as he banged the scanner down on the counter.

“Stop it! Stop saying that! I didn’t do anything!” Rose shouted, tears streaming down her face in horror of what he said was wrong with her but even worse, at the look of betrayal in his eyes. She had never been on the receiving end of the Oncoming Storm and combined with the hurt and angry look he had on his face, it was killing her.

“Well, obviously you did something!” he said, barely holding onto this temper. The very air in the medbay seemed charged from his anger.

“I didn’t! I’m tellin’ you this isn’t right. I didn’t do anything. If you don’t believe me look at my memories! I swear! If I’m pregnant then someone did somethin’ to me! Oh god! Someone did somethin’ to me!” she said and began shaking and fell to the floor, vomiting what was left in her stomach.

The Doctor stood there in shock. After he absorbed what she said, a new kind of anger began simmering in him. Rose wasn’t lying. She was genuinely frightened and he had stood there being a jealous pillock. He had to find out what had happened to her. There weren’t many times they had been separated. He quickly calculated backwards and thought of only two possibilities. He dismissed the Go’zk Satellite as there was nothing there that could do this to her. All they’d found were some inorganic silicate life forms. No, this had to have happened on Mosh.

He knelt down and pulled her into his arms and pulled out a handkerchief to help her clean up and then swept her up and set her down on an examining table, pulling his jacket off and covering her with it. “I’m sorry, Rose. I’ll figure this out, I promise,” he told her as she trembled with tears streaming down her face.

“Doctor, I would never,” she said, her voice cracking. “I couldn’t. I don’t want anyone but….”

“Rose, you don’t owe me anything,” he assured her, feeling awful for treating her so badly when she was a victim of something unthinkable.

“No, I want to tell you,” she said with conviction. “I..I’ve been afraid to say it because I thought you’d leave me but I don’t want you to ever doubt me. I’ve barely looked at anyone that way. How could I when I have you, most impressive bloke in the universe. I…I love you. How could there be anyone else when I feel that way about you. And before you get scared, don’t. I don’t expect anything. I know you have all this burden and the universe rests on your shoulders and the last thing you need is some silly shop girl hanging on you but…I just want you to know. I’m never gonna leave you unless you want me to.”

The Doctor stared at Rose and felt his heart break open just a little. He did love her oh so much. He knew she loved him. He was closer to her than he had been with anyone in a very long time. Perhaps centuries since he allowed someone this close. It had been jealousy that made him say those things to her. How could he not be jealous of anyone who was able to share that sort of intimacy with her much less conceive a child with her. He was convinced he could never have that with her and it tore him apart. 

“Rose Tyler, my Rose, how was the universe so kind as to drop you into my life? I am so unworthy of that kind of love. You deserve someone much better than what I am,” he said softly, his eyes shining with the love he felt for her yet couldn’t express. He was too much a coward to say the words, afraid the moment he said them, the universe would snatch her away and break his hearts. He placed a finger on her lips as she tried to protest and laid a gentle kiss on her forehead. “This changes nothing about how I feel about you and whatever this is, we’ll get through it together. That’s us, the old team, shiver and shake, the stuff of legends. I’m not going to lose you over this and I am going to find out who did this?” She nodded her head.

“Good, let’s get you comfortable and hydrated and I’ll perform a more thorough exam and find out exactly what happened. He hooked up an IV to her and found a pillow and blanket. She laid there still and quiet. She was in shock. He worked quickly to get things set up. If this was an alien pregnancy, it was vital that he determine it and quickly. She may need supplements or other care to support what an alien pregnancy would do to her body and he was determined to get her whatever she needed.

As he performed the scan, he noted that she was definitely dehydrated and her body was deficient certain minerals and vitamins which was probably due to her illness. That was easily sorted. When he focused on the baby, he paused. He rubbed his eyes and looked again. “This isn’t possible,” he said, shocked.

“Doctor, what is it?” she asked in a fearful voice. If he was worried it must be bad.

He re-ran the tests over and over again, even taking a sample of her blood to confirm what the in depth scan revealed. He stumbled back and looked at her, his mouth opening and closing unable to speak.

“Doctor, just tell me. Please! I have to know,” she said, her voice filled with anguish.

“It’s not possible. It can’t be,” he whispered, shaking his head.

“Just say it!” Rose shouted.

“The baby…it’s part Gallifreyan. It’s…I’m the father.”

“What!” Rose shouted and sat up. “I mean whadda you mean you’re the father? You and me have never… Have we?” she asked, staring at him and trying to figure out how this happened. She was sure she’d remember shagging the Doctor as it did take up part of her dreams and maybe a few stray thoughts here and there.

“No, we haven’t. I mean, we’d know. I’d known,” he said, looking scared. “Rose, I need to look at your memories.”

Rose nodded. “Okay, but am I okay? Is the baby okay? Is anything wrong? How could I get up the duff without us shagging? I mean is this some Time Lord thing?”

“Your both fine and Time Lords don’t…that is to say, my people haven’t procreated this way in millennia. Not that Time Lords don’t uh dance but it was not a priority. My people sort of looked down on it.”

Rose stared at him. “They didn’t like to shag,” she said in disbelief. “Well how did you make little Time Lords then?”

“It’s complicated and we really need to find out what happened to you so can we talk about this another time?” he said, sounding uncomfortable and fidgeting.

Rose bit her lip, her eyes never leaving him. “All right, but we’re not done with this conversation. So what do you need me to do?”

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Just relax.”

Rose laid down and tried to relax. It wasn’t easy considering all the questions whirling around in her mind about how this happened. She was going to have not just a baby but the Doctor’s baby. How would this affect her, them, their traveling and oh gawd, she’d have to tell her mother.”

He placed his fingers on her temple and winced at her frantic and emotional thoughts, especially the one about telling Jackie. “Rose, try to relax a little bit more, think about something calm.”

Rose immediately thought of the console room and sitting on the jump seat listening to the quiet hum of the Tardis. The Doctor smiled and felt her contentment and something else. He realized there was a connection between Rose and the Tardis. That was new. It wasn’t a full bond but there was definitely something between them. He tucked that information aside for later. “Rose, I’m going to go back in your memories, back two and half months ago. You might feel memories flash for you. Don’t be afraid. They’re just memories and they can’t hurt you.”

“I’m not afraid as long as you’re with me,” she thought to him and mentally embraced him in a hug.

If being in her mind had brought him a certain amount of peace, that comment and embrace, nearly brought him to tears. It had been so long since he’d felt anything like it. He calmed himself and dove in to her memories. He brought up their trip to Mosh. Suddenly he paused. There was a locked door and not just any locked door. This had the seal of Rassilon on it and there was only one person who could do that, him. But, he had no memory of this. He took a moment to search his own memories for any blank spots or anything missing but it was all there. If it wasn’t his past then it had to be a his future. A future him.

“Doctor?” Rose asked. “You’re quiet all of a sudden.”

“It’s nothing, just a door. A locked memory. I’m going to unlock it, Rose. Try to stay calm. Remember, it’s just a memory.”

Rose swallowed hard and tried not to be upset. “Yeah, okay. Let’s do this.”

“Okay, allons-y,” he whispered and began working on the door. It didn’t take him long and then he began watching events unfold. His future self pulling Rose aside, declaring his feelings for her, her sympathy and worry, their passionate interlude and finally, his mad future self locking her memories and leaving a message for her.

He pulled back in horror as it all became clear to him. He looked down at Rose who was looking at him with anger and sadness. 

“Rose, I…”

“Don’t, just don’t! You did this and you took my memories. You mucked about in my mind knowing how I feel about that and you…you,” she said, crying and unable to finish as she ripped the IVs out of her arms. “I need to be alone.” She practically ran out of the medbay.

He stood there in shock, horror and self loathing. What could he say? She was right to run. He was a monster, was and would become a monster and she would be his victim. If he could regenerate himself on the spot he would have. He looked at the medical equipment and swept it off the counter in one violent movement. How could he do this? He paced and ripped at his hair and began tearing at equipment until he slid to the floor amongst the destruction and went back to look at his future self’s message again. He hadn’t really paid much attention the first time so repulsed by what he had done and the madness of his future self’s thoughts. It was what he feared the most, that he would lose his sanity and become the most dangerous creature in the universe, the biggest monster of them all.

dwdwdwdwdwdwdw

Rose ran down the corridors until she couldn’t run anymore. She was exhausted and still suffering from the effects of what she now knew was morning sickness. She arrived in front of door she’d never seen before. It opened easily and inside she found a Victorian parlour. The walls were covered in blue and cream Victorian print wall covering and it was filled with vintage velvet cushioned chairs and divans with dark wood ornate tables and oil lamps. A few old Earth paintings of landscapes and seascapes hung on the walls and a tea service was sitting on the table almost as if waiting on her. She walked in and sat on one of the blue velvet chairs and looked down at the tea service. She could feel the Tardis’ hum almost as if comforting her. Rose looked up at the ceiling which was white with intricate carved relief work.

“What am gonna do, girl?” she asked the Tardis. “I love him. But he…he shouldn’t have done this.” The table before her was illuminated and Rose reached over for a cup of tea and sniffed at some of the pastries. She nibbled on a scone and realized she was hungry. As she ate and sipped her tea, she thought about memories from that day and the message he left her.

She couldn’t regret what they’d done in that meadow. It had been them and he told he loved her which apparently he’d not done before. He’d been desperate to make sure she knew that. He had been so broken, this future Doctor. Rose could still feel horrible for him and was not sure if she would ever forget that lost and broken look in his eyes. He had lost everything and broken all the rules just to see her. Well, do more than see her. “He shouldn’t have taken my memories, my choice,” she muttered bitterly. Even though she knew he was trying to protect her and preserve a timeline, it still stung.

He purposefully came back to shag and leave her, knowing he would muck about with her memories. Then, there was his message. She dropped the half eaten scone when she thought about it. He’d lost her and she him. Something had ripped them apart and he had suffered and lost his way. After he had lost everyone, he fell into madness. Tears once again filled her eyes as she thought about what it would take to drive him to that state of madness. 

“Rose, by the time you remember this, I will more than likely be gone, maybe. Of course, you never know what the universe may have in store for me. I know how angry you must be with me and you have every right to be. Please don’t blame younger me who you are now with, at least I hope you are still with me. I’m sorry and I know that will never be enough but the me you’re with won’t become this me now. I’ve arranged that. I was always better with you. I’ve embedded some of my memories regarding critical points in time surrounding certain people who crossed my timeline, people who were important to me and will be so for you as well. They need you and me Rose. Help them. Don’t let me fail them this time.”

Rose didn’t know what memories he was talking about. She felt she should remember something but she couldn’t quite see it. It was like a blurry image she just couldn’t grasp. She sat back and thought about what he’d said and all he’d done. He’d altered time for her. She felt a terrible guilt that he would violate temporal principals and risked everything just to keep them together and yet, part of her couldn’t help but be thankful. Life did not often hand you second chances. As angry with him as she was, how could she throw away his sacrifice of his own timeline just to give her and his younger self this chance much less not give this baby a chance at a magnificent life. She settled her hand on her stomach and closed her eyes. No, she wouldn’t throw this away. It wouldn’t be easy, of that she was sure but she would fight for it as much as he had. Rose fell asleep dreaming of things that she had never seen from a Doctor who probably no longer existed.

dwdwdwdwdwdw

The Doctor paced the corridors of the Tardis thinking about his future self and what he’d become. It horrified and sickened him to think about being so cavalier with time and crossing his own timeline in some sick and depraved violation of Rose and not just her body but her mind. If his people were alive, he would be condemned for violation of dozens of laws and would be lucky if he was only regenerated. It terrified him the more he thought about it. His future self had altered an event that was meant to happen and that would have serious consequences. He worried about those consequences and how this child now played into that. This was not so simple as visiting Rose for a shag. There was more to this, much more. Now he knew why he had taken ill earlier. He was feeling the reverberations through time and space for what future him had done. This was bad, as in universal imploding bad. One mad Time Lord could easily destroy everything with very little effort. He had to find out what his actions had done and see if he could fix it and that wouldn’t happen wandering the corridors stewing over how loathsome he was.

He quickly made his way to the console room and began evaluating what was happening. It soon became apparent that the universe was under stress and was slowly unraveling. It wouldn’t be too long before a complete implosion. He needed to find his other self and stop him before things deteriorated. First, though, he needed to see Rose safe. He swallowed hard and knew what he had to do. It would hurt but he needed to make sure she was away from danger, away from him. Just as he was setting the coordinates, Rose walked in. “Doctor, I think…we need to talk.”

He paused what he was doing and squeezed his eyes tightly shut. She sounded so tentative and shaky. Nothing like his confident Rose and he had done this to her.

“Doctor,” she said with a little more strength when he failed to acknowledge her. After she had napped, Rose had come to a conclusion. They would work through this and if nothing else, it only proved he needed her. She couldn’t let this version of him succumb to madness. If this other Doctor from the timeline where they were separated and gone to all this trouble to see them together and obviously suffered, she needed to make sure he didn’t sacrifice himself in vain. The Doctor needed her, she needed him and now this baby needed them both together.

“I’ve set the coordinates to take you home,” he said, without looking at her and staring down at the console.

“What do you mean take me home?” she demanded, upset at the thought that he was trying to chuck her out already.

“You need to be safe, to be home with Jackie where she can help you. I won’t…I can’t allow you to be hurt and if you stay with me, you will be.”

“That’s not true! You would never hurt me! The only way you’ll hurt me is to leave me behind!”

He finally turned to her with an anguished face. “I’ve already hurt you, violated you in the most intimate of ways. How can you even stand to look at me. Don’t you see, Rose? I’m a monster and will be an even worse monster. You don’t even know the extent of what I’ve done. I can’t bear the thought of hurting you anymore or of hurting…”

“The baby, our baby you mean. It is you know, our baby and you didn’t really hurt me, Doctor. I know why you, he uh future you or whatever did this. He shared it with me.”

“It doesn’t matter!” he shouted and paced as he gripped his head. “Don’t you see what I’ve become! I altered events that I was a part of! Changed what must be, acted like some power mad omnipotent being trying to bend the universe to his whim with no one to stop him. How many times have you and I stopped someone just like that. I’m a Time Lord, Rose. The only thing stopping my people was ourselves and now they’re all gone. What’s to stop me from running rampant across time and space?”

Rose walked up to him and slapped him. He looked at her stunned. “I’ll stop you. That’s the point you daft alien. It’s why future you or whatever did this. To make sure I would be there to stop you. Don’t you get it? I love you and I’m not gonna stand here and let you do exactly what caused you to become him. That’s what happened. You lost me and things went badly, people were hurt and you blamed yourself and fell into despair. I’m not gonna let that happen. Besides, you owe it to junior here to stick around.”

He stared blankly at her. “What? You think you get to swan off and leave me with your alien baby? I don’t think so! That’s not gonna happen so you can just stop moping and trying to make decisions for me,” she chastised him and crossed her arms in front of her and stood in the Tyler woman battle mode stance.

He reached up and touched his cheek. “You slapped me,” he said in shock and amazement not saying anything about what she had just lectured him on or his revulsion at calling his offspring, Junior.

“Well, you were being an annoying miserable git,” she responded. She walked up to him, her face softening and ran her fingers across the red spot where she had slapped him. “Stop,” she whispered.

He stared into her eyes for a moment before pulling her into a huge hug. “Rose,” he croaked out and held her to him as if the world would end if he didn’t. Rose squeezed him back her arms wrapped around him. 

“It’s gonna be all right. You just have remember we’re partners in this. I can’t do this without you. So stop being a controlling idiot, yeah?”

He pulled back and shook his head. “I don’t deserve this. I….”

Before he could continue a holographic message began to play. It was other him lounging against the console.

“Hullo younger me and Rose!” he shouted out jovially.

Rose turned to the Doctor whose face had hardened as he glared at his future self.

“I’ll bet young stupid me is about pop a gasket,” he said popping his p. “That’s all right, I would too and you are after all, me. You must be wondering why I’m here on your ship. Well, I mean holographically, I’m not really there precisely which I try to be. I’m probably gone,” he said and stared out as if lost in thought. “That’s a bit of a glum thought isn’t? Anyway! I’m here because the Tardis sensed other me has foolishly tried to send you home, Rose Tyler. And, that would be wrong. It’s what started me down this path which I’m sure you’ve gathered is a bit…mad!” he said and tossed his sonic in the air. “Oh yes, quite mad, me. Been on a bit of a tear I have, altered a fixed point, caused a brave, brilliant human to kill herself to stop my tinkering,” he said trailing off, his voice breaking. “I…I went too far. I stopped caring. He looked up at them then. “They told me my song was ending. I was going to die. I don’t want to die, Rose.” He straightened up and his mood shifted and he began pacing.

“Too much to do and see and touch and taste. You know I do like to taste things,” he said as he nervously paced. “So, I left after Adelaide and ran. But then I thought, when did it all go wrong and I knew oh how I knew. Bloody Torchwood. It was them,” he said darkly, his fists clenching in anger. “They took you from me.” Then he whirled around and smiled. “So I fixed it. I arranged for someone to sort them for me before they could cause trouble. Isn’t that brilliant! Now they couldn’t take you, Rose and you would stay with me. I’ve seen some of the possibilities but…can’t see my own future so it’s a little bit blurry. But!” he said loudly and pointed at them. “I know it will be brilliant. Especially with the little one on the way.”

He shifted again, his face softening. “I’m sorry if I hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you, only keep you safe and this baby, he changes everything. I’m so so sorry for altering your memories but I had to. You weren’t ready yet and neither was younger me. You needed time together.” He shifted into manic mode again. “And here you are! One big happy family! Wellllll, maybe not big,” he said tugging at his ear. “In a few months maybe but not now. You’ll be beautiful nonetheless. Other me is a lucky bastard and I’m sure right about now he’s realizing that.”

The Doctor next to Rose snorted. He was not happy listening to this.

“But now for the hard part,” the older Doctor continued. “You see, everything has a cost,” he said, his eyes darkening and his face falling. “I tried so hard, Rose. I didn’t want it to happen,” he said brokenly looking out at her. “Please…please believe me. I’ve tried everything to save them both.”

Rose turned to her Doctor. “Doctor, what’s he talkin’ about?” The Doctor next to her swallowed hard. He had a horrifying suspicion and hated himself for it.

The hologram continued. “It was an unforeseen variable. When I found out, it was too late. All I wanted to do was stabilize your timeline and the baby was meant to do that and he did, your safe but…”

Rose’s hands went to her abdomen. “No,” she whispered. The Doctor next to her, tightened his arm around her.

The hologram Doctor had tears running down his face. “It was the Tardis you see. She had touched you, made you different, left a piece of herself tucked away inside of you dormant until…well until you suddenly found yourself with…” he said gesturing toward her abdomen. “Anyway, it created not just a complicated event in space and time but triggered a reaction in space-time like I’ve never seen. It bound his timeline with someone else who wasn’t meant to exist after the event I stopped.”

“No,” Rose’s Doctor said in horror.

“Oh yes, young me. I know you understand now. The universe is cracking in response. I’ve been to the epicenter and seen it. I’ve been working with the Tardis to try and stop it.” Suddenly he shook violently and fell to his knees. “It’s catching up to me. The ripple that is. Can’t delay it anymore. This timeline is done, soon to be disintegrated. Young me, don’t make my mistakes. Trust Rose. She is more than you think. You know don’t you, Rose,” he said looking out at them. Suddenly the hologram began to break up. “Rose, don’t blame young me. I did my best. I promise you, I did my best to save her.” He paused as he looked at his hand dissolving. “Will you look at that,” he commented before dissolving before their eyes.”

Rose burst into sobs and he pulled her into his arms. “It’s all right, it’s over and I’m still here,” he said, comforting her even though his mind was now racing, thinking about what his mad future self had said and done. This wasn’t over, not by a long shot.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is for who_in_whoville who kept this plunny alive and begging to be written. Also a big thank you to callistawolf who helped push me on this and was moral support when I had a worried writer meltdown. This final chapter has one particularly angsty part but there is a positive and hopeful ending I promise! Part of this had me all weepy when I was writing it. Thanks for reading!

After Rose had calmed down, she looked up at her Doctor, staring deeply into his eyes almost like she was searching for something. “He’s gone,” she whispered.

“That timeline no longer exists but I’m still here,” he explained to her gently, still holding her close to him.

“But what he did…”

“Is done. That won’t stop. A Time Lord has a bit of a free pass over some things. We don’t exist like a human does. We experience time differently, see all the possibilities, can even meet past selves without causing a paradox if we’re careful. What he did is what exists for us now. We have to live with his actions. The question is, are you sure you can live with me knowing what I’ve done to you?” he asked, a hint of fear in his voice.

Rose looked into his eyes and memories of what she’d done with future him flashed before her. Part of her was still angry at what he’d done, how he had manipulated her and yet, she still loved him. Could she blame this him for the other mad future version of him’s actions? No. She had already decided she couldn’t blame this him and that she wouldn’t let him become that mad Time Lord. It was a lot to process but deep down, she knew with time, she would make peace with what that him had done. She needed to let go of the past if not for her and the Doctor, for her baby’s sake. “I won’t pretend to not be angry or that I’ll forget what happened, but I told you, I love you and I’m not gonna let you become who he was.”

The Doctor looked at her in wonder. He was amazed at her ability to absorb and accept all that had happened and still want to stay with him. Part of him wanted her to rage against him, to make him pay penance for what he’d done but another part was grateful for a second chance to prove he could be better. He nodded his head. This wouldn’t be easy and he wanted to run from it but if she could face what he had done and still stay with him, then he would be here for her.

“So what happens next?” she asked.

“We have to move forward, continue on. But first, we have to deal with the mess that other me left us,” he said, gently pulling away and walking toward the console to begin judging the amount of damage done.

“He said he did his best to save her. What did that mean? Save who?” she asked, nervous about the answer.

The Doctor paused and his shoulders slumped as if he was bearing a very heavy weight. “Everything has a cost. He changed what I believe was a significant event in Earth history. If certain timelines ended, ceased to exist after this event, the universe will react violently if they’re still here. There are cracks in this universe and that is very, very bad,” he explained and pulled out his glasses and put them on while he looked at some Gallifreyan script dancing across the monitor on the console.

Rose walked up to him, her mind processing all of this. “He said we were separated. I wasn’t here but now I am and there’s a baby. That changes things doesn’t it? So the universe is reacting to me and the baby, right?”

He turned to her and smiled. “Oh but you are clever. Yes and no. He was right, the baby did change things and affected your time line, made you complicated, not that you were simple before but and that’s a big but, something else happened.”

“He said it bound our baby’s, timeline with someone elses who wasn’t meant to exist after he mucked about with this thing that was s’pose to happen. Who would that be?” Rose asked.

The Doctor didn’t answer her. He continued to focus on the screen, scrutinizing the information flying before him. He didn’t want to answer Rose and tried not to think about that particular consequence as watched the data on the screen. Something was off with it. His other self had done something but it didn’t’ make sense.

“Doctor, who is our baby’s timeline bound to?” Rose asked again, louder and with more emotion.

He squeezed his eyes shut and paused before slowly turning to face her, his eyes reflecting his inner turmoil. “I’m so sorry, Rose.”

“Who is it?” she asked, tears welling as her instincts told her who it was.

He walked over and took her hands in his. “Neither you nor Jackie were meant to be in this universe after this Torchwood event took place.”

Rose looked at him and pulled her hands from his and stepped away stumbling back to the pilot’s seat. “Mum,” she croaked out. “Oh gawd, don’t make me choose between my Mum and my baby!” she wept.

The Doctor felt gutted. Again, he had brought Rose pain. It may not be this him who had done it but that didn’t really matter. He still bore the responsibility and not just to Rose, but to Jackie too. His hands trembled slightly and his stomach rolled with guilt and the shuddering of a universe close to collapse. As the baby grew in Rose, it caused that much more stress on the universe. A choice would have to be made, sacrifice his unborn offspring or Jackie. He turned to the console and set a course for Jackie’s home. He needed to see her, look her in the eyes and Rose needed her Mum.

Rose sat up suddenly and looked at him with a tear streaked face. “Wait, he said he’d done his best to save her. That means there’s a chance. Doesn’t it, Doctor?” she asked with hope in her eyes.

“There’s always a chance, Rose. I can see evidence that he’s done something but I need to study it and I need to see the epicenter.”

“Epicenter, where’s that?” she asked with a shaky voice.

“I think you know where it’s at and it’s where we need to be right now,” he answered with a voice filled with knowledge and pain.

She did know and nodded her head with her hand over mouth trying to stifle more tears. She held on while the Tardis hurled them through the vortex which was shaking worse than normal from universal reverberations for what was happening. They landed with a hard thump. The Doctor got up from the floor and ran to Rose who had been hanging onto the pilot seat for dear life. He helped her up and they walked to the door and stood there nervously.

“It’ll be all right,” he said in a voice that did not convey any confidence in that statement and he opened the door. What greeted them was something he would never forget.

Jackie sat on a chair drinking tea and beside her was a wall with a giant jagged crack in it leaking out white light. Jackie didn’t seem particularly bothered by it or couldn’t see it. He could tell Rose didn’t see it as she seemed too calm. Jackie set her tea cup down and walked up to them. Rose ran out and hugged her. “Mum! You’re all right!” she said and squeezed Jackie tight to her.

“Course I am, sweetheart. Everything’s fine,” she assured her and looked over at the Doctor. A shadow passed over her eyes and the Doctor knew that Jackie was aware of what was happening.

“Jackie,” he said softly, nodding his head and then fixated on the crack.

“You’re the other him aren’t you?” Jackie asked softly and then turned away and walked toward the wall staring at it. “I’ve been waiting for you, you know. I knew you would bring Rose home to me when it was time.”

“Mum, what are you talkin’ about?” Rose asked, worried and frightened for Jackie.

Jackie looked at her with a happy, peaceful expression. “It’s going to be all right, sweetheart. I know what’s happenin.”

“No,” Rose said, shaking her head in disbelief. This wasn’t happening. She heard the buzz of the Doctor’s sonic and suddenly the crack on the wall appeared before them. Now they all could see what he could see. Rose gasped and looked at her mother who had inched closer to it. “Mum! Don’t! Get away from it. It’s dangerous.”

Jackie turned to her. “It’s all right, sweetheart. You’re gonna be fine and so will the baby. I’ve seen it, seen him with you and the Doctor.”

Rose’s mouth opened but no words came out. She couldn’t believe this was happening. How could her Mum know?

The Doctor stepped forward next to Rose. “Other me paid you visit, didn’t he, Jackie,” he said. “You know about the baby, the crack and what’s happening.”

“Yeah, I do. I’ve known for a while now. Been having dreams about this. Himself, other you, came here all broken up like, told me what he’d done, the good and the bad. It was awful and he knew it. He just wanted to make things right and I think he did. He promised me I would see Rose before it was time.”

“Time? Time for what?” Rose asked, her voice broken with what she feared was going to happen.

Jackie looked at her sympathetically. “Don’t blame him too much, sweetheart. He just wanted what was best. Went about it like a complete nutter but he knew when he mucked things up. He wanted to fix everything and told me he would but, I knew he couldn’t fix it all. I know both me and the baby can’t stay and it’s all right. I’ve seen him, watched him grow up in my dreams. Felt like he spoke to me sometimes. He’s beautiful, Rose. He’s so beautiful and smart and…he reminds me of your Dad. All I wanted for you was to be happy and to have a family and now I know you will. I’ve seen it with me own eyes and I know you’re going to be fine and I’m gonna be fine too, just not here.”

“Mum, no, please!” Rose gasped and stepped toward Jackie but the Doctor held her back. Rose turned toward him. “Let go of me! I won’t let this happen!”

“Rose, you can’t get any closer. Things are too unstable. It’s already progressed too far and with you and the baby and Jackie standing so close to it…it could cause the whole thing to crash down around us.”

“But, she’s my Mum!” Rose cried, tugging at him.

Jackie backed closer to the crack which grew larger and brighter. Jackie looked at the Doctor. “He promised you’d take care of her and I expect you to do that. So help me, you leave her somewhere or send her away again and I’ll come back and give you a slappin’ you’ll never forget!” Jackie chastised him as he pulled Rose close to him, weeping and trembling.

He swallowed hard. “I’ll always look after her and the baby but, Jackie, we could still fix this. You have to give me more time. Please, please step away from that thing,” he said, his voice roughened with emotion. “Just come into the Tardis, it will give us a little more time. I can stabilize this, stretch it out.”

Jackie shook her head. “No, you can’t. He did everything he could and he couldn’t stop it and he’s you. I’m not gonna risk my daughter and grandson ‘cos you have to play the grand Time Lord and besides, Pete’s waitin’ for me.”

“Pete?” the Doctor asked softly and looked at the crack suspiciously.

Jackie nodded. “Oh yes, he’s been talkin’ to me for months now,” she said smiling and looked at the large bright crack. She turned back to them. “So you don’t have to worry. I’ll be fine. I’ll be with Pete.”

“You don’t know that,” the Doctor said, pleading with her. Rose was clinging to him now, staring at her mother in desperation, crying and almost unable to speak.

“Mum, please listen to the Doctor. That thing’ll kill you!”

Jackie just looked at Rose and shook her head. “No, it won’t, sweetheart. I just won’t be here anymore. I’ll be with your Dad, and one day…” Jackie paused and teared up for the first time. “One day, I’ll see you all again, you and my grandson,” she said emotionally.

“No, Mum No!” Rose cried.

“You’ll understand one day, Rose. There’s nothin’ a mother wouldn’t do for daughter. And this, this is me lettin’ you live and gettin’ my forever with your Dad,” she said, tears trailing down her face as she backed up.

“No!” the Doctor screamed, pulling out his sonic and aiming it at the crack, trying to stop her.

“I love you,” she said to Rose and looked at the Doctor. “Take care of my daughter.” She stepped back against the light and was enveloped by it, whispering, “Hello, Sweetheart,” before everything went white and a force exploded in the apartment throwing Rose against the Doctor and tumbling them both to the floor.

When Rose opened her eyes, the crack was gone. Sunlight streamed into the apartment like it was just another day, like nothing had happened. Everything was still and quiet.

“No,” Rose gasped and wrapped her arms around herself as she rocked back and forth on the floor weeping. The Doctor sat beside her, staring at the wall in shock. He could feel the universal cracks sealing everywhere. It was done. Jackie had saved them all. He slowly picked up his sonic and scanned the area but there was no evidence of any other temporal or universal faults, cracks or rifts.

His arm fell to his side limply and he looked at Rose. He rubbed his hands through his hair and down his face and pulled them away wet. He gently touched his own tear streaked face almost in shock. Jackie was gone and he couldn’t save her. As he thought this, he felt a horrible loss cut through him and more tears pour down his face. It wasn’t fair. Jackie shouldn’t have to pay the price for what he’d done even if it wasn’t this him that had done it. He looked over at Rose to find her staring at him and then look away, trails of mascara marring her pale face as she looked at the wall.

“She sacrificed herself so we could live, have a life,” she said, sniffling.

“Yes, she saved the universe,” the Doctor said in a soft sad voice.

“Why her? Why did it have to be her?” Rose asked, barely able to contain her sobbing.

“Because she was special and brave and she gave birth to you, raised you, made you who you are,” he explained.

“But I’m not anyone special,” Rose said and stared at the floor.

The Doctor turned to her and scooted close putting his arm around her. “Yes, you are. You’re Rose, the girl who saved a broken down self effacing time lord who was barely alive just, wandering and not caring about anything. You made me care, take responsibility, made me wake up and see the universe again.

“You never gave up and cared about everyone around you no matter who or what they were, your Mum, Mickey, humans, aliens, even a Dalek. You have such a good and brave heart. I think my Tardis saw that in you and it’s why she helped return to the Game Station, not just to save me but because you wanted to help others and were willing to sacrifice yourself. And, you did sacrifice a bit of yourself. You’ve been touched by time, left your mark on her as much as she did on you. You grew up and became the remarkable woman before me, the woman who is going to give birth to someone new and special. You are special Rose and so was the woman who birthed you, helped make you who you are. You both saved the universe. Tyler women are strong and make the universe a better place. Jackie Tyler won’t be forgotten. I’ll make sure.”

They sat there for a while, just the two of them clinging together, listening to the hum of the Tardis and the ticking of the clock nearby thinking about all that had happened, Jackie’s sacrifice and what it meant not only to them but their child. Eventually, Rose got up and picked up Jackie’s tea cup and walked into the kitchen and began cleaning up the dishes. The Doctor followed and watched her from the doorway, knowing this was how Rose was dealing with her grief. He slowly backed away and let her finish. He looked around the flat and knew this would be the last time they were here.

The silence in the flat except for the sounds of Rose washing up, was almost too much for him. He wasn’t used to this, dealing with the aftermath. He was used to running but he knew he couldn’t do that now, couldn’t do that to Rose. Jackie expected him to take care of Rose and their child and that meant not running and being there for Rose, to empathize and feel and help her work through her grief. For a Time Lord constantly on the move, always running from the consequences and his own feelings, it seemed an impossible task but he would do it for Rose. Of course, he questioned if Rose would want him around. After all, it was his fault, all of it. He hoped that she would forgive him one day and so he wandered almost aimlessly in the flat but it wasn’t really aimless. His mind was still reeling over everything that had occurred and something was bothering him.

It was like an itch in the back of his mind and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t figure out what was causing it. He was missing something but what was it? Rose would know. He was positive of that but he couldn’t ask her. At least, not now. She wasn’t ready to dive back into solving mysteries and saving the universe. She needed a break.

He heard her enter the living room. She paused, looked around and then went straight into the Tardis without a word to him. He sighed and followed her inside but left her alone. She needed time to grieve and come to terms with everything, his actions, her pregnancy and Jackie’s choice. So he left her to her thoughts and he did what he did best, tinkered with the Tardis, made repairs and analyzed the events surrounding the whole potential universal calamity. Of course, it was more than that for him. He needed to grieve too and think about what other him had become and done. It frightened him. Rose had promised to stop him from falling into that madness but a part of him was still afraid, especially when he thought about how much worse this could have been. There was also guilt he was bearing, constantly questioning himself about what he could have done, how he could have saved her and kept them all together as a family. These dark thoughts wouldn’t fade away anytime soon. He would ask himself these questions for years.

Even though he didn’t see Rose for several days, he knew she was all right. The Tardis kept an eye on her and reported to him when she was eating and sleeping. He kept them parked in Jackie’s flat in case Rose wanted to collect anything and bring it back to the Tardis. Eventually, he heard Rose come into the console room and lean against the jump seat. He scrambled out from under the console, stood up and looked at her almost afraid to say anything out of fear she was here to announce she was leaving him. He couldn’t blame her if that was her choice.

“Thank you,” she said finally.

He stared at her stunned. “For what? I haven’t done anything for you to…”

“For staying, for giving me time and not runnin’ away. I know you want to but you didn’t and that means a lot to me.”

“Rose, I..” Before he could finish, she was in his arms and they were holding each other. He wrapped her in his arms and inhaled her scent. He had missed her.

She wrapped herself around him too. It had taken her time and tears but she knew she had to accept this, what had happened. Her mum would have wanted her to move on and not mope around. She still had the Doctor and the baby and a future. She could almost hear her mum lecturing her about cleaning out the flat. So, she’d picked herself up and come out to see the Doctor. Despite some anger she still harbored about what other him had done, she couldn’t stop loving him. And, him staying here and giving her time had made her love him even more.

They quietly agreed to move some things from the flat and file a missing person’s report. Jackie Tyler would mysteriously disappear along with her daughter. They would not be returning to this time period again for a long time. After the Tardis was packed with the few items Rose wanted for herself and the baby, she stood in the Tardis doorway looking out at the empty flat. A few more tears spilled down her face as she said goodbye to her mother.

As they dematerialized, she saw the Doctor still and flip some switches madly, pulling out his glasses and staring at something. “Doctor, what’s wrong?” Rose asked.

“Something has been bothering me. I kept feeling like I was missing something, something big.”

“Like what?” Rose asked as she made her way over next to him.

“I think other me did do something. He said he’d done his best and my best is usually well, brilliant.”

Rose rolled her eyes. “Okay, so what brilliant thing did you find?”

“Jackie said she heard Pete calling to her didn’t she?”

Rose looked at the console and fingered some the coral nervously. “Yeah, she did,” she said softly.

“And I thought that was someone or thing trying to trick her but now I’m not so sure,” the Doctor said.

Rose looked up at him. “What do you mean?”

There was something off about that crack. “It didn’t just erase her timeline. I think if other me was very clever and he is me after all, then it didn’t erase her but repurposed her into the universe. Filled a gap so to speak.”

“Mum’s still alive?” she asked excitedly.

The Doctor looked at Rose sympathetically. “It’s not that simple. If the universe repurposed her, she wouldn’t be the Jackie Tyler you knew and she won’t know you either. It’s sort of like what humans call reincarnation, not that I believe in that.”

“So you’re sayin’ there’s another Jackie Tyler out there somewhere but she’s not my Mum,” Rose said sadly.

The Doctor walked over and cupped her face in his hands and looked her in the eye. “A part of your mother lives on in you and will continue on in our child and another part of her is living some fantastic life somewhere in space and time being just as brilliant as she was here.”

Rose threw her arms around him and hugged him hard. “Thank you,” she whispered.

“Oh don’t thank me. Who knows what havoc that woman has wreaked somewhere out there,” he said, smiling at her. Rose smacked him on the shoulder. They were going to be all right and Rose had found some peace thinking that her mother was out there somewhere living another life and perhaps even with someone who loved her the way she deserved to be loved.

A few months later, she would have confirmation of that. The day started like any other day or any other adventure. Rose was almost four months along in her pregnancy and had made the Doctor stop in fiftieth century Earth so she could pick up some things for the baby. They had wandered into a small boutique in London that was filled with unique hand crafted baby accessories, furniture and clothing. The Doctor wasn’t too keen on shopping for baby things but Rose was making him so while she was looking at crib bedding, he was getting into mischief with the latest holographic toys. Rose smiled as she found a quilt with ducks on it that reminded her of one she had when she was a young.

“That’s my favorite,” a familiar voice said next to her.

Rose nearly fell over when she saw the image of her mother standing next to her. She wore a name tag identifying her as Jaquelette. She looked just like Jackie except her hair. She was brunette. After Jaquelette stared at her expectantly, Rose snapped out of it. “Yeah, I had one sort of like it when I was little,” she finally said.

“Did you? Well, maybe you’d like this for your little one then. It’s good to pass on some family heritage. You know, we have some matching accessories. They’re adorable. I just used them in my own nursery.”

“You, you have a baby?” Rose asked, almost overwhelmed with feelings.

“Yeah, a baby boy. His name’s Tony. A right little terror he’ll be. I can tell already. He’s his father’s son.”

“Congratulations,” Rose whispered.

The Doctor came bounding up and put his arm around Rose. “Hello, find something interesting.”

Rose looked up at him. “Yeah.”

The Doctor looked at Jaquelette and the duck quilt. “Jaquelette is it? Why don’t you put the duck stuff with the stuff your husband is packing up for me. I gotta say, Pete is one heck of salesmen. Want anything else, sweetheart?” he asked Rose, knowing her emotions were overwhelming her.

She shook her head. “No the…the quilt is fine. Thanks.”

Jaquelette smiled and went back to the till to wrap it up. Rose turned and saw her father’s double and Jaquelette smiling and ringing up their purchase. She turned to the Doctor with tears in her eyes.

“Sometimes the universe gives back and when it does, it’s best to say thank you and not question it.” Rose just nodded her head.

When they arrived back in the Tardis with their purchases, Rose felt a certain peace settle over her. It was almost like she could finally put her mother to rest and move forward. She was ready to embrace her impending motherhood and life with the Doctor without having all that sadness and grief hanging over her and weighing her down.

“You all right?” the Doctor asked as he began the sequence to send them into the Vortex.

“Yeah, I am. I really really am she said.

“Good,” he said, nodding his head and feeling the change in her and being a little more relieved himself. “So, mother of my future offspring, where to next?” he asked her with enthusiasm.

She smiled as a formerly blurred memory suddenly became clear. “London, December 2007. I think we need to pay a visit to H.C. Clements corporate headquarters.”

The Doctor looked up at her with raised eyebrows. Rose smiled at him. “I think someone there might need our help,” she said and grinned broadly. Her enthusiasm was infectious and the Doctor, picking up on this memory was soon joining her and shouting “Allons-y!”


End file.
